sebastian
Active Member
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So I've acquired a slave to train. The boy and I agreed that I would train him for one month and then re-assess the situation. My physical attraction to him is not as strong as I would like (ok, to be blunt, he's not as hot as I would like), but I decided that I wanted the experience of training a boy, and he understands that this is probably not going to be a permanent relationship. He's eager to be trained, as he's been interested in being a slave for a while.
Within the first week of training him, we stumbled into a land mine. He's in his late 30s, and in his mid-20s, he was raped by a boyfriend he was breaking up with. It was a pretty traumatic event, something he's been running away from ever since it happened. He never told anyone, but very quickly after I started training him, he felt compelled to open up about it to me, with the result that he's been pretty emotionally raw--he's broken down several times and cried about it. He says that having the structure of my protocols is forcing him to confront the ways it's affected him. For example, I ordered him to dress more neatly, which made he start seeing that he was being sort of sloppy about his appearance because he felt like a victim. And I've ordered him to seek out help from a rape counseling center.
I've been learning a lot from the experience of dictating protocols to a boy. One thing I've struggled with is letting him open doors for me. I gave him a protocol to walk slightly behind me, but to move ahead of me and open doors. But it's been hard to break myself of the habit of opening a door for myself, especially when that door swings away from me, which requires the boy to go ahead of me, open the door, walk through it, and hold it open for me. It's forced me to realize the ways that protocols bind the dom as well as the sub; I have to provide him with opportunities to serve me.
What sorts of things have other doms struggled to get used to with a slave/regular sub?
Within the first week of training him, we stumbled into a land mine. He's in his late 30s, and in his mid-20s, he was raped by a boyfriend he was breaking up with. It was a pretty traumatic event, something he's been running away from ever since it happened. He never told anyone, but very quickly after I started training him, he felt compelled to open up about it to me, with the result that he's been pretty emotionally raw--he's broken down several times and cried about it. He says that having the structure of my protocols is forcing him to confront the ways it's affected him. For example, I ordered him to dress more neatly, which made he start seeing that he was being sort of sloppy about his appearance because he felt like a victim. And I've ordered him to seek out help from a rape counseling center.
I've been learning a lot from the experience of dictating protocols to a boy. One thing I've struggled with is letting him open doors for me. I gave him a protocol to walk slightly behind me, but to move ahead of me and open doors. But it's been hard to break myself of the habit of opening a door for myself, especially when that door swings away from me, which requires the boy to go ahead of me, open the door, walk through it, and hold it open for me. It's forced me to realize the ways that protocols bind the dom as well as the sub; I have to provide him with opportunities to serve me.
What sorts of things have other doms struggled to get used to with a slave/regular sub?
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) and by the looks of things, I'm sure you'll be able to help him (along with the professional help).
