Released.

sweetsub31 · Aug 30, 2012

I know it sounds stupid and silly, but a part of me doesn't want to try and find a new Master because I am holding out hope that things will change on his end, and he will have time for me again. I'm not a silly young girl, so even saying that makes me feel stupid. It's just that things were so perfect between us that I can't imagine any other Dom living up to what he was for me. I really appreciate all of your well wishes and advice.

RopeRanger · Aug 31, 2012

Sweet, I understand where you're coming from. Mine and I recently decided that things weren't working out for us and so we've split. It's really for the best as it was a long distance relationship and work was making it very difficult to devote the time she needed and deserved. We too, communicated on a daily basis so i really miss that. With no creative outlet I've had to make sure that i don't turn into a grouchy asshole and take out my frustrations on my coworkers. While the split was amicable it's taken about months for me to decide to start searching again. It truly can be a draining process. Of course anything worth having is worth working for.

Take a break, don't rush. Things may change for your Ex or you will find someone else. Either way. you can make it through this.

sweetsub31 · Aug 31, 2012

Thank you Ranger. I'm glad to feel a little less alone in this. I can relate to you saying that you have to be careful not become a grouchy asshole. I have to really watch that I don't take any of my emotional issues out on my children, or friends. One of the hardest aspects is pretending nothing is going on, when inside I'm lost. I appreciate your kind words and support.

sebastian · Aug 31, 2012

sweetsub31 said:
One of the hardest aspects is pretending nothing is going on, when inside I'm lost.

Maybe you should open up to a few of your friends or your older children. You probably don't want to bring up the whole BDSM thing, but there's nothing wrong in telling friends or older children that you were dating and it didn't work out and it's left you feeling sad because you felt that you were clicking. Trying to hide this sort of thing completely is going to make it harder on you.

sweetsub31 · Aug 31, 2012

sebastian said:
Maybe you should open up to a few of your friends or your older children. You probably don't want to bring up the whole BDSM thing, but there's nothing wrong in telling friends or older children that you were dating and it didn't work out and it's left you feeling sad because you felt that you were clicking. Trying to hide this sort of thing completely is going to make it harder on you.

The problem is I'm married to someone else. We have an open relationship but our friends and family do not know that, and my husband and I don't discuss our other relationships. Also my kids are very young. But thanks for trying to help. At least with this community, I don't feel so alone.

sweetsub31 · Sep 2, 2012

That little reveal shut the convo down!

sebastian · Sep 2, 2012

Sweet: I wasn't surprised by that. Lots of couples make arrangements like yours, especially when one partner is interested in being submissive but the other doesn't want to be dominant. In larger BDSM communities, you can find that sort of arrangement without too much looking.

RopeRanger · Sep 3, 2012

I keep my alternative lifestyle hidden. Not having a support network is a difficult situation to be in. I was lucky that work was so overwhelming the past 4 months that I was not able to focus on myself. That seem to help in my situation.

The best advice I have is that it takes time. It still sucks and you still hurt, but it will get better.

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