First ball gag is in the post. What to expect???

Discussion in 'General BDSM discussions' started by Bondage_newbie, Dec 2, 2010.

  1. Bondage_newbie

    Bondage_newbie New Member

    Hi, as I've described elsewhere, I'm new to bondage and very inexperienced. One of my boyfriends favourite things to do to me is forced orgasms. We have a magic wand vibrator and if anyone here lives within a 20 miles radius of our flat then you've probably heard me over the buzzing.

    He's advised/told me that I'm getting a ball gag. It's in the post and should be arriving soon. Part of me is excited, part is nervous. He's convinced me that it's necessary and I kind of agree but how does it feel and do I need to know anything before being helpless with it strapped in? Are they really that effective at keeping you quiet and is it totally impossible to talk? We're not starting with a beginners ball gag, I'm getting chucked in at the deep end with a normal one but that was my decision! Any advise that you could offer me would be great!

    Thanks, Kate x
     
  2. L8NightQ

    L8NightQ Member

    newbie -

    Looks like you guys are off to a good start with the wand. I understand how loud it can get.

    Your question about what your experience will be like is completely dependent on what kind of gag you have. Please describe it better... But for now I'll tell you that you "will" be able to make "some" noise but with a standard ball gag, you won't be able to talk... unless it's a small one.

    Either way, a ball gag will drastically cut the amount of noise you can make but it won't make you silent. People in the next apartment may hear you, but not across the street.

    When you're gagged, it's very important to change your safe word to a safe gesture or some other method of letting him know when you need him to stop.
    You both need to understand and agree on what that safe gesture is.

    Many use a tap system.. like three taps, with anything, like hand, foot, head if necessary.

    You could also use a toy or anything that can be dropped once you need to signal a change. Don't know if this will work with you since forced orgasms tend to make your hands open "and" close (ha ha).

    Just so yo know... a 2 inch ball gag is considered large for a woman. I hope yours is a 1.5 or 1 and 3/4 inch. It will last in your mouth a lot longer without your jaw getting so sore, but ask him to remove it from time to time while you're getting use to the experience.

    Here's a suggestion to use if you find it too big and uncomfortable (or just to switch things up). Find one of those squeeze balls that usually have some advertisement on them. They're made of spongy rubber that will form to your mouth and expand to keep your mouth open but isn't hard enough to hurt your jaw. The nice thing is that he can force it into your mouth to shut you up (it seals pretty good) and he can take it out when he wants you to service him.

    You can also push it out yourself in an emergency..... if you have permission of course.

    Remember to establish a "safe" signal for when your gagged.

    Oh yea..... make sure your not allergic to rubber! Don't wait till your tied up to find out.

    Hope this helps.
     
  3. sebastian

    sebastian Active Member

    Very good suggestions, L8. Another common safety gesture when gagged is to shake your head back and forth while grunting 'uh-uh'. Lots of options, just make sure you agree on one or two before you start playing, so there's no confusion. And make sure you can actually do it when gagged.

    A good gag always has something that will prevent it from sliding all the way into the mouth. A strap that runs behind the head is the standard one. When your hands are free, this isn't much of a worry, since you can pull it out if you're in distress. But when your hands are tied, if there's nothing to keep it sliding all the way in, a real chance exists of choking, and depending on what happens, it's possible for the dom to not notice what's going on. One common gag is a sock or pair of underwear inserted into the mouth. There is a very real risk of choking on these, even if the end of the sock is hanging out of the mouth. You don't have to swallow something to choke on it; all it has to do is block enough of your upper throat that you can't breathe through your nose. Quite a number of burglaries have turned into homicides when the victim was gagged and then choked on the gag.
     
  4. I've always used one cheap ball gag I have, but if I was going to get another I would get a breathable one. I don't like not being able to breathe as much as I want to.

    As for a safe word I saw someone on another site using a dog training clicker that was strapped around a finger. They could do anything with their hands opening and closing, but the clicker was always there. Just needed another finger to press it once or more. Great idea.
     
  5. A safe toy, to drop if in distress. In fact, I have two; one for if the actual session is too much for me to cope with, and another because I suffer with painful joints, and some positions can be absolutely excruciating :(
     
  6. sebastian

    sebastian Active Member

    OLP, have you tried yoga or Tai Chi? Both are supposed to be quite good for joint pain.
     
  7. No, never tried either, will have to look into it, cheers Sebastian :)
     
  8. subspace

    subspace Member

    Puppy - did you ever find a good gag? I know you had issues with one and ended up taping it. Did that work?
     
  9. kittengrey

    kittengrey Member

    Hey guys, long time no see xD
    Another thing about gags is the taste. I have a rubber ball gag/mask, and the rubber tastes horrid. I'm slowly getting used to it, but at first it was so bitter to me that I couldn't stand having it in my mouth.
     
  10. The bad taste of the rubber ball gag I have is part of the experience for me. When I'm gagged I love the feeling of not liking it. It makes me gag until I cover it in saliva. Then the taste goes away or I just get used to it. Either way the taste I hate and love. Haha

    I've always wanted to try a penis gag though. They look more effective and fun than a ball gag.
     
  11. L8NightQ

    L8NightQ Member

    There are now plenty of ball gags that don't have that terrible rubber taste.

    Might be time to upgrade. They don't just taste bad, they make your mouth taste bad to.
     
  12. bottomisbest

    bottomisbest New Member

    perfect gag

    If you want to take it up a notch. When I play dom I like to first put the ball gag & lock it in place. Check to make sure the ball in lodged tightly in the mouth. Then add as many pieces of duct tape you want. Its best when you play a rape victim because you can scream all you want & no one is gonna hear. Gags are the best part!
     
  13. sebastian

    sebastian Active Member

    Just remember that if you use duct tape, you're getting into breathe control territory. The dom has to be very careful to make sure the sub can breathe through the nose. And don't ever leave a sub alone who has been tied up and gagged with tape. Helpless and unable to call for help is a recipe for a visit to the morgue.
     
  14. L8NightQ

    L8NightQ Member

    bb- When you give advice like this, it would be wise to include the down side of this action. There are many less experienced folks who might take you at your word.... well not to many, I hope.

    Like your enthusiasm though.
     
  15. L8NightQ

    L8NightQ Member

    Guess you got to him first Seb. Nice comment.
     

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