Aftercare

Ms.sub13 · Mar 30, 2009

After my master punishes me for doing something wrong he lets me cuddle up next to him in bed and he lightly pets me. While petting me he kisses my forehead and tells me how good of a slave I am and that if I listen better I won't have such sever punishments. My master and I have gotten so close we actually got married. After each session he makes sure I am ok and usually lets me take a nap to feel better and after I wake up I go and sit on his lap and kiss him. I think each slave should feel that closeness and comfort by someone they give complete control to. There is always that part of a slave that needs to feel love and compassion. It is human nature

Nyx · Mar 31, 2009

I love being petted and cuddled and gently scratched after a punishment or performing a task I find particularly unpleasant.
After care is really important. I have yet to get to the point where I have cried (although my top and I are testing some limits next weekend so I probably will) but if I do, I know that the aftercare will be even more essential. My top has promised to pay special attention to me after.

Obedient Little Puppy · Mar 31, 2009

That's good to hear

Tonight's play session wasn't too heavy; there was a bit of physical fighting and spanking, but no flogging or anything. The last part was really gentle, and afterwards my master wrapped me up in my duvet and snuggled up beside me. The interesting thing was, my hands were still tightly tied to the bed, but I was really happy to stay like that

Sparrow69 · Apr 1, 2009

This is the exact reason why I feel that internet D/s and long term bdsm relationships never work. To me, aftercare (as you put it) is all aboout the basic human need to connect with another human being after, wheither it be emotionally or physically traumatical. I think Phantasm hit the nail directly on the head on this one. Fixing something emotionally, by showing care for it after abusing and breaking it, is exactly what creates those bonds we all crave in this lifestyle.... coincidentally, its also how Stockholm Syndrome and Battered Spouse Syndrome occur in those relationships as well. How many battered women do you hear say, "but he's so loving afterwards... he just gets mad sometimes but afterwards he always lets me know how sorry he is and does something super special for me..."

Obedient Little Puppy · Apr 1, 2009

I can sort of see your point, Sparrow, but at the same time (and please correct me if my assumption is wrong) it sounds as though you are implying that the rest of us are in some way stupid or weak for wanting to use aftercare

Sparrow69 · Apr 1, 2009

absolutely not. I think aftercare can, and does, build a stroger bond between a sub and a dom in any form. I was merely pondering how often the psychological aspect of it is actually witnessed in modern day society, without the majority of people realizing it. I'm glad you want aftercare, it shows that your submissive nature is given freely and willing. Those who don't want aftercare are those who are actually broken, and don't care what happens, while they secretly plot their own escape, possibly even from life.

I'm sorry I confused you.

Obedient Little Puppy · Apr 1, 2009

That's okay. More than likely I misinterpreted what you were trying to say.

And yeah, I can imagine how someone who was broken beyond fixing could also be beyond caring about anything that happens to them in that relationship. I was just talking to someone about this, and I personally feel that aftercare is also a furthering of the trust that a sub has to put in a dom, for their BDSM relationship to work successfully.

PuppyPuppyPuppy · Apr 1, 2009

I don't know about the rest of you but I need to be cared for after a beating or humiliation. I need to know that I am worth something and that my Master cares about me.

Also, I want Master to beat me more often and harder so that we can have more aftercare. I want to feel my connection to him grow stronger. He doesn't think I am ready (I'm overly emotional and I cry a lot and he doesn't want to push me too far) although I am willing to take the beatings to the next level. I'll wait for Master to decide whether I am ready and I'm sure we will both benefit from the experience.

I sometime wonder though... my mother was a battered wife and I was beaten by my step father when I was little. I was also abused by another father figure later in life. I know that my history has a lot to do with decisions that I make in my relationships now, sometimes I wonder how much. I would never let my boyfriend/husband/master treat me the way my mom was treated but I still yearn for some of the same abuses.

Prissy · Apr 1, 2009

Obedient Little Puppy said:
That's good to hear

Tonight's play session wasn't too heavy; there was a bit of physical fighting and spanking, but no flogging or anything. The last part was really gentle, and afterwards my master wrapped me up in my duvet and snuggled up beside me. The interesting thing was, my hands were still tightly tied to the bed, but I was really happy to stay like that

I am unsure what the bolded item is. Can you please explain it to me?

As for being bound to your bed, I have experienced that before, usually from waking up that way. Sometimes I hate it, because I don't like the thought of not knowing who tied me up, but at the same time It gives me something to do, as to trying to figure out how to escape, on the chance it wasn't Master that tied me up. I am lucky that it has been him the most of the time. Once it wasn't him. I have absolutely no idea who did it.

Obedient Little Puppy · Apr 1, 2009

Duvet? Quilt, on the bed.

And I've never been made to sleep in bondage, and to be honest, neither would I want to.

Aftercare

Ms.sub13

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Nyx

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Obedient Little Puppy

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Sparrow69

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Obedient Little Puppy

Moderator

Sparrow69

Moderator

Obedient Little Puppy

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PuppyPuppyPuppy

Member

Prissy

Member

Obedient Little Puppy

Moderator

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