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So, a question for you all - when did you know you were Dom (or sub)? What was the thing that made it clear to you?
In a way, by asking the question I am trying to clarify what I am feeling. Recently I came across this forum, and the reactions of my body are telling me I'm hitting a major sexual nerve... It was reading The Loving Dominant that turned the key, it's a solution to an internal dilemma which kept a certain instinct locked up for a long time.
I was raised in a very loving family, very ethical and slightly hippy, with the clear message that pain or anything away from free will was bad. This seems to have raised some barriers against an inclination which goes back (as far as i can tell) to age 6. In hindsight, the fact that I locked up a girlfriend at a tender age, and the hidden but persistent preference for girls in leather, latex and later handcuffs should have told me it was more than the usual passing interest. Still that instinct stayed carefully suppressed.
But just recently, I find that even thinking about some of the sections in TLD or the idea of a willing, consensual sub is causing, shall we say, elevated heart rates and a noticeable tightness in the nether regions - indeed my entire torso seems to be getting in on the act. And that is very different from my usual reaction to beautiful women, which is more akin to aesthetic appreciation and a distant lust, although my libido has always been quite high.
It seems clear which way the wind is blowing...
In a way, by asking the question I am trying to clarify what I am feeling. Recently I came across this forum, and the reactions of my body are telling me I'm hitting a major sexual nerve... It was reading The Loving Dominant that turned the key, it's a solution to an internal dilemma which kept a certain instinct locked up for a long time.
I was raised in a very loving family, very ethical and slightly hippy, with the clear message that pain or anything away from free will was bad. This seems to have raised some barriers against an inclination which goes back (as far as i can tell) to age 6. In hindsight, the fact that I locked up a girlfriend at a tender age, and the hidden but persistent preference for girls in leather, latex and later handcuffs should have told me it was more than the usual passing interest. Still that instinct stayed carefully suppressed.
But just recently, I find that even thinking about some of the sections in TLD or the idea of a willing, consensual sub is causing, shall we say, elevated heart rates and a noticeable tightness in the nether regions - indeed my entire torso seems to be getting in on the act. And that is very different from my usual reaction to beautiful women, which is more akin to aesthetic appreciation and a distant lust, although my libido has always been quite high.
It seems clear which way the wind is blowing...
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