People judging. What is your input in views on today's society and judgement?

Conlabentis

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Opinion and ridicule are different things and while someone can disagree with your lifestyle the harsher issue is when governments and communities take actions to stop you from living as you choose within the comfort of your own home and within social circles.

And, while religion in general proponent of the "Do No Harm To Others" thing in regards to pain and suffering, there is a double negative in most cases where people tell you how you should live and that is in and of itself a hurtful act if the lifestyle is core to your personality.

You can manage to be discreet, be social in the comfortable settings and even interact with those who would judge or ostracize you but in the long run people get tired of having double lives and these things slip. The truth is, as long as you do something where hurting another person or letting someone hurt you, even for pleasure, then people are going to disagree but if you SEEK acceptance for how you live in the larger world people will tend to shun you merely for differences in comfort zones.

You shouldn't have to hide who you are, but people don't have to like you if don't, even if they are cruel and unreasonable at times for doing so.

PS: I do not agree or condone people ostracizing others from society because of life choices, I merely was playing devil's advocate for those not comfortable with the lifestyle we chose.

PPS: LIFESTYLE refers to BDSM. The Gay/Bi thing is bigotry and should be frowned upon in general, despite religious views.
 
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Div

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I don't think most people really think about it, honestly. I've been in a BDSM relationship with varying degrees of intensity for about three years now, and from what I've observed, those people leading "vanilla" sex lives don't even give BDSM a thought. I know I didn't. It never occurred to me that it might be interesting or a turn-on. I simply didn't think about it, and I believe that's how it is for most people. My group of friends will make jokes about BDSM acts now and again, and I laugh along, but not for the same reason they laugh. It's more of an "If you only knew" type of laugh when someone mentions fuzzy handcuffs they got as a gag gift.

I don't think people judge the practice of BDSM because it's not something they stop and think about. Everybody has an opinion about homosexuality and gay marriage and all that, but if you asked someone about BDSM, they'd probably say "uh, I guess that's a little weird." Talking about relatively reasonable people here. I'd expect some would condemn us all to hell, but they might also condemn you to hell for eating a banana seductively, so that's the type of opinion that I set aside somewhat.

I've seen BDSM mentioned in the media. In an episode of Friends, Phoebe says Mike isn't there because he's back home, chained to a pipe. There's an episode of Bones where they're investigating the murder of a girl who was bound for BDSM reasons and ended up dying that way, and Booth says that the sex must not have been fulfilling because if that were the case, they wouldn't need all the extra stuff. There are other examples as well, but none of the characters really give it a second thought. The general consensus is that it's "interesting," but I never get the idea (from that media or the people I'm watching it with) that anyone thinks it's reprehensible. It's just kind of there. I don't think people understand it, nor do they have any interest in understanding it.

Maybe I haven't paid enough attention, or haven't been around enough to notice, but I haven't felt or noticed much in the way prejudice on the BDSM front. The majority of people have their ignorance, and they're happy with it. And I'm happy with that as well. It's a private matter anyways, in my opinion. We're not hurting anyone (unless they've been bad) and the general public can't tell the difference one way or the other.

Of course, BDSM is kind of in the eye of the general public at the moment, due to the success of 50 Shades, which I refuse to buy on principle based on what I've heard. But as much as I've heard it's a terrible book with a completely inaccurate representation of BDSM, it may yet be doing some good. The fact that it is popular at least nudges people in the direction of forums like this, where they might learn what's actually going on and be able to form valid opinions instead of just ignoring the idea altogether.
 
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