A few n00b questions

Discussion in 'General BDSM discussions' started by Moskva, Oct 29, 2008.

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  1. Moskva

    Moskva New Member

    Hi everyone! ^^
    Im new to the forums as well as fairly new to BDSM.

    Though I have yet to participate in a Master/Slave relatioship, I know I would want to be the master. My first question is - does anyone know of any sites that would provide punishments/activities as well as things to expect, etc.

    My second question is - what is the difference between a slave and a pet?

    And lastly, do other doms (or even subs) find it difficult to have that sort of relationship over the internet? For those who have had a master/slave in RL and online, which was easier? Which was more fulfilling?

    Thanks! ^^

  2. amandaxlynn

    amandaxlynn New Member

    Speaking from personal experience, I have found that any Master/slave relationship is obviously not always easy. I have had both RL and Online experience with having a Master and I preferred forming the bond online and then slowly building on that until a meeting is set up and then it continues from that point on. It seems to make it an easier transition because you're getting the best of both worlds, it seems. You are able to securely and safely get to know someone before having to interact with them face to face. I am a more shy sub, and I usually require someone to bring me out of my shell so that method has always been the most effective in my case. I would definitely recommend being extremely careful, regardless of how you choose to approach the situation. There are, sadly, a lot of people out there who aren't 100% honest about who they are.

    I don't want to be the one to answer your question about the difference between slave and pet. I have never experimented with a "pet" or being one, and I'm not totally sure what a pet is, myself.

    Here is a good site for information about punishments, discipline, etc:
    http://www.leathernroses.com/generalbdsm/generalbdsm.htm#punish (the whole site has tons of great articles for starting up, as well)

    Hope I helped you. =)
  3. Moskva

    Moskva New Member

    You did a wonderful job helping me! ^^
    The site was just what I wanted and your answer gave me a whole new perspective on what I should be looking for. (as far as online or IRL). Thank you so much! <3

  4. amandaxlynn

    amandaxlynn New Member

    That's awesome to hear, I'm so glad I could be of service. =)
  5. Prissy

    Prissy Member

    From what I understand about your second question, and I could be wrong, but a sub, a slave, and a pet, are all virtually the same thing. But some people like myself don't like the Slave title, therefore they will be titled as a sub, or pet.

    Like I said I could be wrong, being fairly new to this myself.
  6. Moskva

    Moskva New Member

    Not trying to be condescending, but subs, slaves and pets are three totally different things. Yes, they're based on the same things - but they have different aspects.

    I did some research after I asked the question, and found that out. :-D
  7. Prissy

    Prissy Member

    Thanks for the answer Moskva. Do you think you could pm me the location you found out? I would love to know the differences as well.
  8. ReallyGreen

    ReallyGreen Member

    sub/slave/pet, in common usage, mean the same thing to most people: They are the 's' in a D/s relationship. However if you want to get technical......

    Slave: Person who is "owned" by their partner. Slaves basically surrender control of themselves. Master says "jump" slave asks "how high?", Mistress tells her hetero slave to suck cock, slave will suck cock. If you find yourself questioning your dom, suggesting what might be fun tonight or you use your safewords on a regular basis you might not be as much a slave as you think you are.

    Sub: Sub is usually synonymous with slave because the slave is by definition submissive. But you can be submissive outside of a TPE relationship. The sub retains his/her "vote" in the relationship. Some people in a S&M-heavy lifestyle may not give a crap for domination or humiliation.

    Pet: Can be used for subs into animal role playing (pony/puppy/pig etc). Or it can be a term of endearment for a live-in slave or just about anyone really. 'Pet' probably has the least iron-clad meaning of the three terms. People in non-kinky 100% vanilla relationships sometimes use the term 'pet'. (ie, teacher's pet or "Hey man, haven't seen you at the bar lately. Did your little blonde pet finally let you out of the house?")
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