Terminology Question

stripped · Jul 11, 2009

OK, in a nutshell...My neighbor, 25, and her husband have a leather dress up role play pretend thing going on. The problem is that she isn't playing after a certain point and likes to be whipped, (hard whipping, welting, bleeding, etc.) which he can't stand to do, so he brings her over here. OK, my question is; After he brought her over the last time, and we were done, she sent me an email, and apologized for "peaking", and asked if she was ever allowed to come over again...what the hell is "peaking"?? Incidentally, she cries very hard during / after her visits, after which she usually sleeps until morning, then she's allowed to go home at some point. Thanks in advance for your answers.

praefect · Jul 11, 2009

Personally I wouldn't worry too much about the crying considering she wants more. Try to find out if it was a good or a bad cry. Sessions like that, for one, can trigger a release that doesn't directly have to do with the pain and isn't at all a bad thing. The one time I had a release like that I didn't even know what it was about, and I'm pretty sure it wasn't the sensation of the massage I was receiving at the time. It's draining though, so her sleeping is also something I wouldn't worry too much about.

The peaking.. you didn't give her any rules on closing or averting her eyes, did you? That would be the first thing I thought of.

Perhaps she meant reaching a "peak" of some sort, something having to do with a cathartic release perhaps? Sorry for freaking out on you, maybe?

I don't know. My magic 8 ball is out of commission. Probably best just to ask her, and ask her about the crying, to clear things up while you're at it. Personally, I find that if I wonder about something the chances of getting an answer are greatly improved when I ask the person concerned directly about whatever is one my mind. That's still possible in the set up you've arranged with your neighbors, or not?

Edit:
Never mind, I just realized you were only asking about the terminology. Sorry, I always get a bit - somethingsomething - when I see posts like "She said XYZ - what do you think she means" When the answer is clearly asking her, not a couple of strangers.

So, terminology. BDSM for Dummies mentions a peak, which is the point where ... wait, let me quote it.

"Many scenes can reach a peak (In which a bottom either safe words, or comes very close to safe wording)"

stripped · Jul 11, 2009

Well, the crying is during every visit, and has been that way since she was conditioned after the 4th or 5th time together. It's definitely from the pain. And she's always sashed / blindfolded, so no variation on the eyes. She is not allowed to speak once she comes over unless she's directed to, that's why she e-mails later. She's very worried that I am done with her because she "peaked"...hmm...thanks for your input, though. I'm so damn curious as to wtf this "peaking" is.

praefect · Jul 11, 2009

If she's using "peaking" in a similar way as the term is described in BDSM for Dummies I would say you reached her limit.

stripped · Jul 11, 2009

Excellent suggestion, thank you. I did a bit of searching online to no avail. That may very well be the answer...hmm.

Phantasm · Jul 11, 2009

I've always used "peaking" to refer to having an orgasm.

*shrugs*

Martello · Jul 11, 2009

Hey maybe posting a lexicon isn't a bad idea.

Terminology Question

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