red flag?

Discussion in 'General fetish discussions' started by nsdnq, Feb 25, 2012.

  1. nsdnq

    nsdnq New Member

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    so I've been talking to this sub for awhile now, and we're scheduled for our first session tomorrow. Theres just one thing that feels a little off...

    She seems to take it a lot more seriously than I've ever seen or heard of. As in from the word go she's been in scene, and doesn't seem to ever be "not playing", like being submissive is her permanent personality. if that makes any sense.

    Is this something worth raising an eyebrow at or is it something common and I'm just over analyzing?
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  2. Aibo

    Aibo Member

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    My ex were like that, so not 'play' but lifestyle. But it might as well be her way of charming you, in the submissive way.

    From what you told it sound to me I tend to think you've found another of those extremely rare ones.
    One other dominant once said 'it's one in a million'. Now in hindsight I say its even more rare. So I understand you're a bit surprised, but also somewhat envious. :) Red flag? No way, its so adorable.

    So to sum up, it is not common, the personality trait do exist. It sometime do come with a few oddities bundled. With the wish for slavery they feel odd in regular society, and they might dress and behave as misfits as well.
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  3. skinbound

    skinbound New Member

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    I knew this gothic girl once and she had an extreme gothic style 24/7 and could not get a job because of it,
    I think its worth raising an eyebrow, these are mostly very strong people who need to limit themselves, like in a (mindset or) sub state of being.

    if you notice that her submissive state is draining her from her potential, I would discuss with her to explore the psychology behind roles, because your interested, if she's more practical oriented just put a whip in her hand (after a session) and give her a pillow as target, or something more your style. (just to interrupt her polarized pattern)

    I think the role of sub suits her well (no red flag there, like Aibo says), and she can maybe enjoy it even more when she drops in and out of it sometimes?
    Last edited: May 3, 2012

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