Master training?

Discussion in 'General BDSM discussions' started by Ellie, Nov 20, 2008.

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  1. Ellie

    Ellie New Member

    I don't know if this question has been asked before, but in my search for the master of my dreams I've hit a speed bump and am in need of advice. I know that although most people have a tendency to lean towards the dominant, submissive, or both category, not everyone out there is aware enough of their own tendencies and preferences to identify this. My question is, do you think it is possible to bring to the surface the dominant tendencies in an average man that doesn't know much (if anything at all) about domination?

    I can't make up my mind on whether it can be done (with the right strategy and tactics, and patience), or if some people just naturally lack the capacity for domination and can't be molded and shaped no matter how hard you try. Now I think I've just contradicted myself because if someone is that easily swayed and if I were able to mold his behavior into what I wanted, then who's really the dominant one and the submissive?

    Any advice or insight would be greatly appreciated.
    Last edited: Nov 20, 2008
  2. Moskva

    Moskva New Member

    The simple answer trying to mold him into being dominant will do nothing but make you dominant and him submissive. You will technically be training him, which a Dom/me does.

    If he wants to be dominant, he will have to figure it out on his own other wise you will have switched sides and not realized it. If you're submissive and he is as well (which is sounds like) then maybe the two of you should be submissive to a Dom/me together.

    If you are looking for a Master only, and he just isnt cutting it - then dont drag yourself down trying to 'train' him to be your Master. He obviously isnt the right one for you and, in the end, the relationship will fail. Find someone who fits your qualifications right from the get-go.
  3. Ellie

    Ellie New Member

    Thank you, Moskva, for your insightful reply. After giving the matter some thought, I've decided that it's best to not try to bring out the dominant tendencies in a potential master and just let time dictate where his tendencies fall. You're right about possibly setting up the relationship for failure over unrealistic expectations.

    However, there's always role playing games and the entertainment value of that would substantiate the effort! I think that would be a better option because it can be done as often or as little as you want. It also would not require the maintenence and effort of trying to mold someone that isn't willing into a dominant role.
  4. ReallyGreen

    ReallyGreen Member

    Yes, but then you have to buy all kinds of dice and graph paper and stuff.
  5. Ellie

    Ellie New Member

    What's the graph paper for? That's a whole new kind of kink. I guess my leather belt fantasies are mild compared to others, but it's still a fantasy.
  6. Moskva

    Moskva New Member

    You're quite welcome. :)

    And roleplaying him as the Master every now and then would help him get the hang of it, but be careful how you go about it. Have him do his own research online on techniques and such so you arent instructing him while you play.
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