Femdom: When Mistress Isn't Perfect !!

Discussion in 'General BDSM discussions' started by shannon2012, Jan 19, 2010.

  1. shannon2012

    shannon2012 New Member

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    Somewhere along the line, perhaps in the online land of Fantasy/Roleplay the idea has arisen in the minds of some that Dommes are never to be questioned. We're always right - even when we are wrong. While I love the thought of always being right (smiles), let's be realistic. No one is ever always right. On occasion we are going to be so totally wrong that we will surprise you.

    So...what does a good submissive do in a situation like this? Hopefully, the two of you have discussed this possibility before it occurs and you know just how your Lady would wish you to proceed. If you haven't, I'd suggest a few things to consider:

    1. Think before you speak. Take time to make certain 'You' are not the person in the wrong. If after due consideration you still believe she is wrong, then decide how to best approach her. Every Domme is different. I'm pretty laid back about most everything but even I don't like the blunt approach. Be tactful!

    2. Make certain your motive for doing this isn't to belittle or demean her or to try to make you look better than her. She'll likely be able to see through the situation and identify any underlying motives.

    3. Keep your emotions in check. Emotions are often mirrored so proceeding when you are angry or resentful will likely thwart your efforts.

    4. Develop a strong case. You know she is wrong because of A, B, and C.

    5. Request permission to discuss the situation with her. "I noticed this and I'm concerned about it. Could we please talk about it?" Be careful not to approach the topic at a wrong time (like when she first gets home from work).

    6. Be solution-oriented. If all you are doing is complaining, you're not being a helpful submissive. Offer the solutions if she asks for them.

    7. Say something nice. If you're going to criticize anyone a good rule of thumb is to begin with a sincere compliment, offer the criticism, then end with a sincere compliment. (Not all in the same sentence of course.) "I know you are someone who likes to always do her best so I thought that this might be something you would like to take a look at."

    8. Be sure and listen to her response. It's likely that she isn't the only person in this situation who needs to evaluate their actions/words.

    Most of all, be tactful and respectful of her feelings. Hearing we've made a mistake isn't easy for a lot of people but it's necessary for growth both as an individual and in relationships. I'm not saying that everything that occurs online is fantasy/roleplay. The online world for many (not all) does tend to be that sort of playground.

    ...Join The Biggest BDSM and Fetish Personals Community Website for all those Living or Interested in Knowing More About the BDSM or Fetish Lifestyles! GO HERE!



    To Your BDSM and Fetish Enjoyment,
    Shannon E.
    {Shannon2012}
     
  2. EZRA

    EZRA Member

    WHAT!?!
    NO! Way! is Mistress ever wrong!:)
    Clearly if something is wrong it's my fault. :)
    (tease)

    I would definatly agree with your approach to bringing something to your Dominates attention.
    I would only add that it's probobly true of all Dominates and not just Female Dominates.

    Welcome to the forum and I hope your here to stay.
    As I have mentioned in another thread or two we could really use more Female Dominates here.
     

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