Is it just me...

Discussion in 'Section open for any subject to discuss' started by rick1283, Feb 17, 2011.

  1. rick1283

    rick1283 New Member

    Or is this site used mostly for videos that you could probably find anywhere else?

    When I came here, I was expecting a very active community of people with desires like mine. But instead I found a site where the only thing done seems to be the posting of videos at bot-like speed.

    I thought I would have some luck within the aforementioned community that I have lacked everywhere else I've looked, but it seems that nothing has changed.

    I would very like to discuss this and perhaps get to know the very FEW active members that I've seen around better.
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  2. ki-lan

    ki-lan New Member

    from what i have seen there are at least a few rather active members. i think the main problem is ppl who lurk on the forum without posting or who post once or twice and then go inactive.
  3. rick1283

    rick1283 New Member

    I agree. And then the people who seem to do nothing but post the non-member made videos.
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  4. Dianne

    Dianne New Member

    I'm not sure.

    I haven't been a member for long, as you could probably tell. I, too, was disappointed at how few people are posting here. I think there are a lot of people like me who are curious about BDSM, joined, but haven't really dived in as far as forum posting goes.

    I'm curious about it but I don't have any experiences to share or questions to ask just yet, so me posting isn't really...necessary, you could say. I'm not really in a position to actively seek what I'm looking for just yet, but I've joined 2 sites so far to get accustomed to the way things work in the community, when it comes to sites about it anyway.

    That could explain why it isn't as active as you were hoping. It bothers me that people aren't as active, but that's only because I'm too shy to start any conversations on my own. Mostly due to inexperience in what most people would want to talk about here.
  5. rick1283

    rick1283 New Member

    But that doesn't make sense at all, to me. If you are curious, actively ask your questions, don't lurk around and hope to figure it out.

    I haven't been here very long, either, and I am new to this as well, but I actually want to learn more about it.
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  6. Dianne

    Dianne New Member

    Most of my questions have already been answered in the FAQ or by other people who have posted already. Not to mention that since I'm on more than one site, I've had even more of my questions answered so far.

    The only way I could have more to ask is when I start a D/S relationship with someone and am confused about something. Right now, I've got nothing to ask about that hasn't been answered.

    Unless there is something that I haven't read about yet that I should be asking questions about, I'm drawing a blank.
  7. rick1283

    rick1283 New Member

    But I am also actively searching for a dom with no luck at all.
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  8. Dianne

    Dianne New Member

    I wish you luck in that. I'm not looking forward to how frustrating it might be for me to find a Dom. ;)
  9. rick1283

    rick1283 New Member

    Dianne, it's a LOT easier for a girl to find a dom than it is for a guy. Just check your PM's from time to time and maybe post in the personals.
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  10. Dianne

    Dianne New Member

    That's kind of my point. A lot of guys who are probably just looking for some quick pics and casual chat. I got two messages like that almost immediately on the other site I joined without even filling out much information.

    They clearly must have only saw that I was a sub and female so shot me a message without waiting to see if my profile matched what they were looking for. I see a lot of weeding out in the future - that's the frustrating part for me.
  11. rick1283

    rick1283 New Member

    True enough, but that may not be the case. What I normally do is talk to them for a bit first.
    A D/S relationship is like any other, you can talk before it, or it could be with someone you don't know...But now we are getting off topic.

    I do think the admins should weed out some of inactive accounts.
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  12. sillylittlepet

    sillylittlepet Active Member

    Well, as the only SENIOR MEMBER to post in this thread so far, I can say that this community is a moderately sized group of individuals who frequently post.
    Sometimes we're posting like all the time and there's a ton to say and excitement!
    Sometimes things move kinda slow and nobody really has anything to talk about

    As far as spammers go, every forums have to deal with spambots and advertisers, and since this is a fairly small community we have a small number of moderators (aka 2). There's nothing wrong with this and if you've noticed, the discussion boards are pretty much spam free. So obviously the mods work hard to clean the boards and keep things on topic

    Also Dianne, this is a shitty site for personals, I'm just gonna say. You should use a fetish dating site like collarme, fetlife,, those are the places you want. And naturally you're going to have to weed out unwanted messages and people who actually seem interesting. Yes, it takes WORK but I would be a little freaked out if finding a dom or a sub was a piece of cake

    (also aren't you guys like, in your teens? dudes relax, there's no russhhh)
    Last edited: Feb 18, 2011
  13. Dianne

    Dianne New Member

    Don't get me wrong, I'm not looking for it to be a piece of cake. But having been around the internet for a while, I've come across a lot of annoying people. Hopefully that won't keep me from diving in.

    And thanks for the suggestions. :)

    Yes, I'm 19 going on 20 (June). Because I've wasted the last few years of my life on things most people would consider unimportant, I feel this overwhelming need not to waste time. And since dating involves having to test the waters...
    Last edited: Feb 18, 2011
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  14. sillylittlepet

    sillylittlepet Active Member

    Lol I'm just saying, its not like some obscure clock is running out or something
  15. Dianne

    Dianne New Member

    Well, I suppose some would consider playing online games 24/7 (I mentioned this in the Sexually Confused thread) unimportant and time consuming. Especially since half the time I'm not really having fun. Just using it as an excuse not to socialize outside of online.

    It's not that there really is a clock. It's just lately I've realized I haven't worked towards anything that I've ever found interesting. Mostly because I'm too scared about failing at it. Dating/socializing being part of that, of course.

    It's more a personal feeling to not waste time on things that won't really make me happy in hopes that I'll stop being scared to pursue something for once.

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