Just one more question if I may....

Discussion in 'General BDSM discussions' started by MistressMaria86, Jan 6, 2013.

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  1. So so I am aware that I have preobably asked too many questions of late but I would really appreciate some tips as it seems my kink is taking me in a new direction.

    So I have joined a BDSM chat room some may even know it but i'll keep it vague for now. Obviously as a Mistress i get a fair few messages asking if people can be my slave/sub etc. They ask me what I am looking for and what they can do to prove their worth... (as per my signature).

    For now I just want to have some fun in the chat rooms - am not sure I want a 'real' slave (am not even sure its possible although I guess a lot of people do it). My questions are such:

    When they say they want cbt what sort of things can I get them to do? Its all over cam and I can see them but they cant see me (prefer it that way).

    They say/ask can I dominate them ....but how ??

    A few have asked to lick my boots etc - am telling too but aside from licking the heel etc etc what else...?

    I think I manage to do a spanking situation ok (I darent say well lol) but I welcome any thoughts on this too.

    I also quite like (and forgive me for this) but watching a sub 'play' with himself until he cums... - can I use this in some way??

    I probably sound like a right twit but if anyone can get past that to say a few words I would really appreciate it

    MM
     
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  2. sebastian

    sebastian Active Member

    There's nothing wrong with asking questions, Maria. That's what we're here for.

    Just a few thoughts:
    1) I like to have guys slap their cock and balls. Have them start gently and slowly have them ramp it up.
    2) Boot licking works for the whole boot--the toe, the ankle, the heel, everything. I look for passion/enthusiasm.
    3) With pain play, what works best is to start mild, slowly increase the force, and then take a break to ramp things down a bit. Then resume, starting higher than where you started before and ramping up more. So the pain rises and falls, but with a rising trendline. That gives the sub a chance to adjust to the rising pain/
     
  3. All of these interactions have to happen online, right?

    You mentioned watching the slave play with themselves. This is a good game for online play.

    Watch them for a while, and then tell them to stop. Ask them why they should be allowed to continue. Get them to beg and plead, and tell you how you are their Goddess, etc. Feel free to ridicule their pleas and tell them they are total losers and don't deserve to come ever again.

    After you feel they have begged for long enough, let them carry on. But then after a while stop them again. Tell them that your real boyfriend has just come home and you are going to give him a blow job because he's a real man, "not a total loser like you". Tell him to wait until you come back, and under no circumstances is he allowed to leave his chair. Tell him you can see the PC screen at all times, and you will end the session if he either moves or plays with himself.

    Wait for a while and then come back. Repeat the begging process...telling him how good you are at blow jobs, and that if he was a real man he could find a girl to give him head instead of having to jerk himself off.

    Let him carry on again for a while, then stop him a third time. This time make him subject himself to a physical punishment to earn the right to come. Catholic fanatics used to use whips on themselves. It's easy to improvise something like that using a length of electric flex. It's very painful, and you need to be careful that he doesn't hit himself too hard. But tell him you want to be able to see the marks on his back.

    You can decide when he's earned the right to come when he's taken enough punishment.

    You can add a psychological slant to this by getting him to tell you when he thinks he's earned the right to come. you can play mind games with him that way. For example...he says "I think I've been punished enough, Mistress."

    You don't answer for a few seconds. Then say "You really believe that?"

    Let's say he says yes. Explain to him that you only take on slaves that can show true dedication. Tell him that dedication comes from inside him, and only he will know when he's shown enough adoration to you. Ask him again if he really thinks he's been punished enough.

    Try to lay on a guilt trip, but of course he can use a safeword if he's really suffering too much.

    If you really want to stretch his out, when you think he's punished himself enough, give him two minutes to come.

    You can even place an iPhone with a big countdown timer near your camera. If he doesn't come in time, you can then decide if you're going to make him earn another time period, or that he simply isn't allowed to come that night.


    Cheers,
    Stanley
     
  4. Wow thanks, some food for thought.

    I think its definitely my 'patter' I have to work on too lol. I thinking I am expecting a bit too much ie they start playing and I join in whereas one guy just 'released' and said you're in control lol which I guess is the point but not being very experienced in the art of giving hand job am not sure what to say .... I use words like stroke up and down, play with your balls, pull on them, I wanna see thick veins etc etc. I have got them to slap their balls too - quite like seeing that. Would it be safe to attach a peg or two to the balls whilst this process was going on?

    As for the boot worship because its only imagined rather than real its more limiting.

    Similarly with the pain play - I know you can get a sub to attach pegs, maybe tie rope around the cock, put a cock ring on (I guess). I also know you can ask them to wear an elastic band on the wrist or cock and ask to snap it if they dont do as they are told or they do something wrong but again its that whole exerting remote authority I am working on.

    Thanks for the ideas though ...appreciate them :)

    MM
     
  5. In terms of pain delivered remotely...

    If you find a sub who is willing to buy one of these remote control electro-shock kits: http://www.e-stim.co.uk/index.php


    ...then I think (from reading the blurb) that the software portion is a free download. So you can potentially control his device from your PC.

    This thing isn't cheap, but it's his dime :) And it lets you "hurt him" at will from a distance.


    One other possibility if you build up enough trust to exchange mail addresses (or just use a PO box if not) is this...

    You buy a few of these key safes and set the combination so only you know them. Place a strip of masking tape over the dials so he can't see the combination, and send one to your slave.


    For a session tell him to place the key to his handcuffs or other chains in the lockbox, and while you are watching he peels off the masking tape with the numbers facing away from him and locks the key safe by spinning the dials.

    The reason for the masking tape is that the key safe will be set to the correct combination in order for him to put his key(s) into it. Sure, there are ways for him to cheat, but you can even get him to open the package on camera to try to minimise the possibilities.

    He now locks himself into whatever chains, handcuffs etc. you decide to use. The keys to all this stuff are inside the key safe.

    He cannot now escape from that bondage unless you give him the combination. It's now up to you to make him earn that information :)

    The reason you have multiple key safes is that he will send you back the one he just used so you can change the combination and send it back to him. Meanwhile there's another keysafe in a package that he hasn't opened or is en route.

    Use dabs of different color paint to be sure which key safe is which, and keep a note of the combinations.

    Cheers,
    Stanley
     
    Last edited: Jan 6, 2013
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