Training a Dom

Discussion in 'General BDSM discussions' started by SilenceMyPet, Jan 18, 2010.

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  1. SilenceMyPet

    SilenceMyPet New Member

    My fiancee who is naturally a Dom has become a switch is now wanting me to become her master, and her my slave. I have tried in the past and she starts topping from the bottom, and unfortunately I don't even notice until she reminds me who is really in "charge". How would I start to train her and make her obey?
     
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  2. kittengrey

    kittengrey Member

    -laughs- gods, sounds like me when I wants my old pet to dom me. The key thing here is not fighting what you are naturally. If you feel more submissive naturally, then tell her you can't do it. Sure, you can try it, but normally if your not dominant naturally, it's hard to just "do it". Plus, its too much stress. Trust me, I'm submissive naturally, and domming her, even though I'm more dominant then she is, was a stress after a while. I'm more submissive then dominant, and she isn't dominant period. well, ok, she can be if you push her, but it just caused too much stress in the relationship. If you feel you can and are willing to dominate her, then communication is the key. Ask her what she wants and expects you to do, and tell her what you expect out of her as a sub. Another key thing is respect. If she respects you as a dom, she won't start topping from the bottom. And another thing that was true for me, is that when she starts doing that, she may want you to be more assertive.
     
  3. EZRA

    EZRA Member

    Only in a very limited circumstance do I ever feel Dominate.
    How ever there are times when my Mistress wants me to be dominating.
    but she is still in charge, Basically she bends over looks over her shoulder and tells me to fuck her hard,and naturally I comply.:)
    And I can feel aggressive, and be aggressive this way, but she is still in charge, I'm just complying with her wishes.
    I have heard and seen talk in this forum of Topping from the bottom, where the Dominate instructs the sub to preform various things that are normally done to a sub missive,bondage,spanking and other things, but it is at the direction of the Dominate.

    "Tie me up slave and then give me a good spanking until I tell you to stop"

    I imagine that there is more than one Dominate who would like to experiance some of the erotic torture they regularly dish out without the loss of control.

    You might talk with her and find out if this is the case.
     
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