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maso_missive
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hopefulsub
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first off, congrats! Must feel great to have spoken to him about it 
In my situation, I introduced bdsm to my bf as a different type of play. He liked seeing me in a leather collar and cuffs. The names are one of the hardest parts though. I like to call him master while we play, and I think he likes it. I still haven't had the talk with him about turning it into more of a lifestyle than random play.
One time when we were playing, I said in a sexy, yet mischievous tone, "May I call you my master?" and finished it with the smile I know turns him on. By then, he was probably thinking I could call him anything as long as he could take me. Since then I've dropped it in on occasion outside of play in the bedroom. I'm not sure what he wants, but I'd recommend talking to your guy. If you're nervous, you don't have to blatantly ask, "Can I be your slave and you my master?" Just try to suggest it, like asking his permission to refer to him as your master. Ask him if he wants a pet name for you. If you keep those lines of communication open, he'll feel more comfortable going places with you sexually.
In my situation, I introduced bdsm to my bf as a different type of play. He liked seeing me in a leather collar and cuffs. The names are one of the hardest parts though. I like to call him master while we play, and I think he likes it. I still haven't had the talk with him about turning it into more of a lifestyle than random play.
One time when we were playing, I said in a sexy, yet mischievous tone, "May I call you my master?" and finished it with the smile I know turns him on. By then, he was probably thinking I could call him anything as long as he could take me. Since then I've dropped it in on occasion outside of play in the bedroom. I'm not sure what he wants, but I'd recommend talking to your guy. If you're nervous, you don't have to blatantly ask, "Can I be your slave and you my master?" Just try to suggest it, like asking his permission to refer to him as your master. Ask him if he wants a pet name for you. If you keep those lines of communication open, he'll feel more comfortable going places with you sexually.
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sebastian
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My advice would be to get comfortable with SM in the bedroom and then discuss taking it outside the bedroom. Once the bf feels comfortable with domming, then extend the domming by having the scenario start outside the bedroom. Maybe he gives you a list of chores that have to be done and when he gets home he evaluates how well you did them and rewards or punishes you in the bedroom accordingly.
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sillylittlepet
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I'm jumping right now! Jumping all over the place!!
Let me tell you my personal experience.
I didnt really know what the specifics of what I wanted when I first started playing with my master, so really it was just spanking and rougher sex. Little by little I came to realize things I was totally nuts about. Usually after we had sex I would tell him all the things that I wanted next time, or how he could be rougher/hit harder/get dirtier. Then I would question him and ask him if he wanted to do those things.
I would call this sebastian's route
You could do that, but you seem kind of antsy.
Since you already know he's into SM play, telling him all the things you want isnt going to freak him out! (hooray!) If you already know a lot of things that you totally want, let him know. Dont go into the bedroom with ropes and cuffs when what you really want is a collar and a mouth full of nasty words.
I think telling him what you want is a great starting point. Figure out some things that turn you both on and go from there!
(also. YESSSSS I knew you could do ittt!!!)
Let me tell you my personal experience.
I didnt really know what the specifics of what I wanted when I first started playing with my master, so really it was just spanking and rougher sex. Little by little I came to realize things I was totally nuts about. Usually after we had sex I would tell him all the things that I wanted next time, or how he could be rougher/hit harder/get dirtier. Then I would question him and ask him if he wanted to do those things.
I would call this sebastian's route
You could do that, but you seem kind of antsy.
Since you already know he's into SM play, telling him all the things you want isnt going to freak him out! (hooray!) If you already know a lot of things that you totally want, let him know. Dont go into the bedroom with ropes and cuffs when what you really want is a collar and a mouth full of nasty words.
I think telling him what you want is a great starting point. Figure out some things that turn you both on and go from there!
(also. YESSSSS I knew you could do ittt!!!
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Sate_Sprie
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I don't really have a ton of experience but I can tell you mine.
My husband and I were newly married when he just out and told me about his interest in BDSM. I was interested also, not a lot at first, but now I couldn't go back if I wanted. I love it. Anyhow, we've started out very slowly at first but within a very short time we wanted to try a 24/7 relationship. That didn't go so well. I was so overwhelmed but not having practiced any bdsm and not really knowing what to do. We ended up stopping all together for a long time. I got pregnant shortly after so now that we've started back with out the 24/7 thing it's a lot better. I'd like to do it 24/7 again, but for now this is what works. It's not as overwhelming. So I suggest taking it slow for a while and working up to that.
My husband and I were newly married when he just out and told me about his interest in BDSM. I was interested also, not a lot at first, but now I couldn't go back if I wanted. I love it. Anyhow, we've started out very slowly at first but within a very short time we wanted to try a 24/7 relationship. That didn't go so well. I was so overwhelmed but not having practiced any bdsm and not really knowing what to do. We ended up stopping all together for a long time. I got pregnant shortly after so now that we've started back with out the 24/7 thing it's a lot better. I'd like to do it 24/7 again, but for now this is what works. It's not as overwhelming. So I suggest taking it slow for a while and working up to that.
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L8NightQ
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mm - I'm very happy for you. Glad you guys are talking.
Walk please. Don't run.
What I suggest is no different than what you've already gotten from the others. Take your time with the transition and the learning curve associated with this kind of relationship, and grow. The nature of Dom (just like sub) may be found in the things we do, but it's really the something we are, and yet we all differ.
sate sprie's experience is not uncommon. (ss - glad to hear about your journey also)
Talk, Read, Live, Research, Define, Experiment, Talk..... Give him time to be
Walk please. Don't run.
What I suggest is no different than what you've already gotten from the others. Take your time with the transition and the learning curve associated with this kind of relationship, and grow. The nature of Dom (just like sub) may be found in the things we do, but it's really the something we are, and yet we all differ.
sate sprie's experience is not uncommon. (ss - glad to hear about your journey also)
Talk, Read, Live, Research, Define, Experiment, Talk..... Give him time to be
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sebastian
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Keep in mind that you've been fantasizing about this stuff for years, bur he hasn't. It will take time for him to develop confidence, technique, and his own fantasies.
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sillylittlepet
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man, dont ask me!
Its bad enough trying to hide it all from friends and parents!
Its bad enough trying to hide it all from friends and parents!
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sillylittlepet
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handcuff_freak
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Awesome! I remember how hard it was to talk to my wife about it the first time. I still get nervous when talking to her about it. Glad you talked to him!
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