sadistic tendencies.

Discussion in 'General BDSM discussions' started by Sally, Jan 22, 2012.

  1. Sally

    Sally Member

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    I trained a few days ago, and while I was on the treadmill and saw my Lord lift weights, I suddenly really want to whip him. when he talked to another guy I wanted to tie them up so they could see each other being abused and beaten ... I know I am not dominant, having a sub is too much responsibility. but I will break the strong man ... whip them until they call me Lord. even if they really hate me. and they do it in front of their friends ...

    any other subs who feel that way? or anyone who have some thoughts about this?
  2. rooluvr

    rooluvr New Member

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    Were these invasive thoughts or were they concious desires?

    Personally, I occasionally get invasive thoughts about all sorts of things, but that's most likely due to a mild form of OCD than any concious desire.
  3. Smallest

    Smallest Moderator

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    How do you know you're not dominant, or a switch? The fact that it's not feasable for you right now doesn't mean you wouldn't enjoy it.
  4. sebastian

    sebastian Active Member

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    Lots of subs have a dominant side, and lots of doms have a submissive side. I see myself as 90% dom, and I could imagine subbing for the right dom. Actually, I think that total doms and total subs are much rarer than those with a little of the opposite quality.
  5. Kor

    Kor Member

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    Dominance and submission aren't exclusive things. You can have quite a bit of both.
  6. Sally

    Sally Member

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    rooluvr: you mean CDO, in the alphabetical order as it should be. haha. I have small signs of it even when I'm in a good mood and energy, then everything should be perfect. I can be obsessed with lines and order.
    I felt that passion. the same feeling I get when I'm doing art. I could not stop smiling.

    Smallest: I've thought about it. I have tried to whip my Lord now, it was fantastic.

    Sebastian and Kor: I did not know this. but it seems logical. a dominant friend of mine told me once that he liked to be marsokist sometimes.
  7. sebastian

    sebastian Active Member

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    Sally: Power exchange is to some extent about contrast. There are many high-powered businessmen and lawyers who love being submissive precisely because it provides a contrast with their day jobs. And many doms are people whose day jobs might not give them a lot of authority. Some of the pleasure of power exchange comes from the opportunity to be something very different from what you are. And humiliation games work best on people who have to drop a long ways from their public status (that's why Sen. Vitter loves diapers, I suspect). What this means is that many doms and subs are already good at the opposite role, because they play that role in public life.

    Additionally, one of the best ways to learn a d/s role is to play the other side for a while. Subbing is excellent training for dominances, because it helps you learn how to heighten the sub's experience. I've learned an enormous amount from being tied up, tortured, spanked, blindfolded, etc. And occasionally it's nice to just take a vacation from your normal role and live as the other half does.

    So if you think you might enjoy being dominant occasionally, ask your dom for permission to be in charge for a night, or an hour. Agree that all the rules that are normally in place are still there, but they apply to the other person. And agree that if he's unhappy subbing, he gets to take it out on you when you go back to normal.

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