Race Play

Discussion in 'General BDSM discussions' started by Proose, Jun 1, 2011.

  1. Proose

    Proose New Member

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    New to site so first thread.

    My girlfriend has been into bdsm for a while
    now, but has recently approached me saying
    that she wants to start race play (im white she's

    As I've said she's into bdsm so looking for ideas
    on how to incorporate race play into the mix
    because short of calling her a nigger I'm all out
    of ideas.

    Thanks in advance for any and all help
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  2. sebastian

    sebastian Active Member

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    I assume she's the sub and you're the dom? There are lots of role playing scenes you can do that take advantage of the copious stereotypes Americans have around race. She could be a slave from the Old South and you're her 'massa'. She's a streetwalker and you're her john, or her pimp. You're a rapist and she's your innocent victim. Do a blacksploitation scene, with you as the 'Man'. You could play out a pick-up scene at a bar. Maybe she's hitting on you and has to play up the 'jungle heat' angle (the idea that black women are constantly horny). Or maybe she's an office worker on her way home from work (who just stopped at the bar for a drink) and you're a crude lout who's hitting on her in a racist fashion (calling her 'brown sugar' or stuff like that). If you enjoy humiliating her, require her to dress slutty and pick you up at the bar (for example, make her dress like a cheap ho). If you enjoy torturing her, a slave scene lends itself very naturally to things like flogging. Maybe she's defiant of your authority and needs to learn her lesson, or maybe she's trying to avoid punishment and you're looking for any excuse.you could start with her acting as your servant for an hour and continually punish her for minor violations of rules you haven't explained to her. "Slave, you forgot to kneel when you offered me my drink. I'm going to have to spank you so you remember it next time." Punish her for making eye contact, for forgetting to say "yes, Massa" and so on.

    Another thing to do is have a conversation with her about what she wants. Ask her what sort of scenes she might want to play out. Have her tell you about scenes from movies or TV shows that she thinks are hot. And ask her what sort of scenes or bits are still unacceptable. After all, playing as jungle heat might feel very different to her than playing as a plantation slave. She might like to be called 'brown sugar' or 'Cleopatra' but be really upset to be called 'nigger' or 'ho'. Finding out what's in her mind might save you some very unhappy conversations when a scene explodes on you.

    The trick here is to let yourself explore all those racist, dark stereotypes that you've been taught to not think about. You're a good guy, and obviously not racist (after all, you're dating her), so it's natural that you don't like to think about all of those ugly, hot-button images. But she's asking you to go there, so playing out scenes like this isn't a sign you're racist; it's a sign that you care enough about her to try and meet her needs. My advice is to start slow and work your way up to the darker stuff like calling her 'nigger'. If you're a nice guy, using that word is going to be uncomfortable and challenging for you. During the aftercare (and you do aftercare with her, don't you?), ask her to reaffirm that she loves you and doesn't think you're a bad person for playing out these racist fantasies with her. You'll probably need some affirmations that you're still a good person.

    Let us know how it goes.
    Last edited: Jun 1, 2011
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  3. Aibo

    Aibo Member

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    Roleplaying is one excellent start on BDSM. Just as sebastian said. There's a long list of opportunities where you cut loose from your actual personalities and so also get rid of the inhibitions you have. Yes I am certain you got some, everyone have, me also. (Got quite a lot of them actually) :)
    Now you use a capital 'P' on your nick Proose, I will also assume that you're the dominant.
    So yes lets check on history and you're a former slave or the son of one who take your revenge on the slaveowners daughter. (This one perhaps better if you're into pain and flogging .....something or whatever.)

    Then the age where mixed marriage were frowned upon, you get the girl who likes you a bit. But she say she cannot marry you, and so you decide to take the matter in your own hands and keep her captive. (A somewhat softer scenario where she likes you, just not the captivity you hold her in.)

    Move forward in time to the age of Kennedy, and you are pissed at the white brat who have had the opportunity to go to university and kidnap her. This one could lead on to very strict bondage and mind fuck opportunities.

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