Public humiliation / embarrassment help

Discussion in 'General BDSM discussions' started by SwitchingItUp, Jul 1, 2012.

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  1. SwitchingItUp

    SwitchingItUp New Member

    Hello E/everyone.
    Hope you're all well.
    I'm looking for help with humiliation ideas, for both men and women.
    Especially things that can be done in public. They don't need to be sexual either.
    It's just that me and my partner like to switch and we both enjoy being embarrassed. But I'm starting to run low on ideas haha.
    So any help would be much appreciated!
    Thanks for your time,
    T&B
     
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  2. sebastian

    sebastian Active Member

    If you're going to do public humiliation, you need to think a little bit about the issue of consent. When you humiliate a sub in the presence of others, you are involving them in your play. That means they have to consent to be involved (since without consent, BDSM is abuse and assault). That means if you're going to play in public, you need to either A) play in places where consent is assumed, such as fetish events, sex clubs, and the like or B) play so discretely that those who haven't given consent don't realize that you're doing anything sexual. For example, you can make your sub go out to a shopping center with no underwear on under his/her clothing, but you can't (shouldn't, really) make your sub do things like eat from a dog bowl at a restaurant. If a stranger might be embarrassed, disgusted, or offended to observe it, don't do it.
     
  3. SwitchingItUp

    SwitchingItUp New Member

    oh I know not to do things like that. we are always very discreet. and its not really sexual things, just more things with a embarrassment factor.
     
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  4. Smallest

    Smallest Moderator

    Is this a reference to that Disneyland post?

    Switching: I wrote some basic ideas for someone else, maybe you'll find it helpful?


     
    Last edited: Jul 2, 2012
  5. sebastian

    sebastian Active Member

    Yeah, that was in the back of my mind. It's just a good example of what not to do. I'm impressed that you remember that post.
     
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  6. Moonlight

    Moonlight Member

    Disneyland post??
     
  7. Smallest

    Smallest Moderator

    In short, a year or so ago someone got kicked out of a restaurant in Downtown Disney for what Sebby was saying- they brought a collapsible dog dish and tried to have the sub eat out of it. I'm into all this and I'd be embarrassed/pissed off at someone doing that in a restaurant near me, so I can't imagine how the spectators felt.

    I can't remember if it came up in context of public humiliation in a sensible thread, or if the idea was 'OMG OTHER PEOPLE DON'T UNDERSTAND MY FETISH. DISRESPECTFUL JERKS,' nor who said it.
     
    Last edited: Jul 2, 2012
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  8. sebastian

    sebastian Active Member

    Yeah, I don't remember the exact context in which it came up, but the person who posted really thought he had been treated unfairly when he was kicked out. Idiot.
     
  9. Moonlight

    Moonlight Member

    Oh my. Yeah I could see why they were kicked out. Geeez some people need to get some common sense.

    Too be honest we have done things in public before. My husband likes to do public things....BUT. No one knew what was going on no one could see us but if someone came around the corner... We have never been caught and we are very careful not to offend anyone. I mean there is public and then there is PUBLIC if you know what I mean. We would never do anything in a crowded area. It was always vacant and we would have warning if someone was coming.
     
    Last edited: Jul 3, 2012
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  10. sebastian

    sebastian Active Member

    Yeah, I don't think there's anything particularly wrong with having sex outside, for example. That's not really 'public', in my opinion. When I think of public humiliation, I think about situations where there are witnesses to whatever is going on.
     
  11. Moonlight

    Moonlight Member

    back when we lived out of town we used to go outside all the time. The skeeters got a bit thick now and then and chased us back in the house but overall it was fun.

    The only time we ever got close to being caught was of all places... Wal Mart! He was messing around in the bread isle. He was busy laughing as my face burned bright red. I had a long coat on so no one could see what he was doing. But suddenly this old lady says "Excuse me but I need that loaf of bread right there." She had no clue what he was doing but my lands was I ever red.
     
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  12. SwitchingItUp

    SwitchingItUp New Member

    Thanks for the replies :)
    I love some of the ideas. But like I said, we're not planning on doing anything too 'out-there'. Just little things that we know about if you see what I mean.
    He had a thing with his ex once who poured water on his crotch to make it look like he'd wet himself, it was on a bus. She made a big fuss about it and this really turned him on. This is the kind of stuff we're looking for, embarrassing but not necessarily sexual :)
     
  13. Moonlight

    Moonlight Member

    I managed to get myself really well. My husband always sends me a text when he is out of work and on his way home. I got a text and it looked like one my husband would send and it was right around the time he got off, so I sent a very sexually explicit text back. My best friend sends WTF?!?!?!?! Me being clueless asked her what was up. She repeated the text and I was instantly mortified. I told her OMG that was not meant for you but my husband. She died laughing after she figured out what was going on. She even posted on facebook... That awkward moment when your best friend sends you a text meant for her husband.
     
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  14. Tarynsslave

    Tarynsslave Member

    Even though I have been required to wear a butt plug 24/7 for a few years now, I still find it quite humiliating having to insert it in Her presence... or having Her insert it for me. Also, being limited to short bathroom breaks only is an enduring humiliation for me.

    Occasionally having to wear my slave collar while out and about in public has always been a humbling experience.

    Mistress Taryn enjoys humiliating me in the presence of Her girlfriends every now and then. The most humiliating was being almost entirely naked while bent over for a punishment spanking while Her girlfriend's were over. I had to say "Thank you Mistress, I've been a disobedient slave" after each stroke.
    Sometimes I am also lent out for performing domestic services at the homes of Mistress's close friends.

    Hmmmm I could keep going all day... I love humiliation as punishment and a training tool :)
     
  15. sebastian

    sebastian Active Member

    Tarynsslave: Had you actually done something wrong (broken a rule of some sort) or was this just a 'play punishment'?
     
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