Over The Phone Ideas

Discussion in 'General BDSM discussions' started by QuietTouch, Mar 22, 2010.

  1. QuietTouch

    QuietTouch New Member

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    So I'm fairly new to the whole domination thing. I've known of it, and pleasured myself to it a few times, but never actually did anything :)

    Well, a freind and I have gotten close enough that some sexual feelings were arising. However, we are limited to phone calls only, and eventually internet because of distance.

    Well, I knew she was into being dominated and I figured I'd make her happy and tell her how to masturbate, how to use her dildo, how far she could put it in. I tried to make her savor everything and never rush anything.

    It was fun, I really enjoyed it and she did too.

    But seeing as how we are limited to the phone for now, doing that a lot may start to get stale, even if I change up how she does it.

    So I was wondering if anyone here could offer me some advice on how I could dominate her over the phone. What I could have her do, what I should make her do I should say. I'm still starting off kind of slow so we are both comfortable with how we do it, but she is probably open to almost anything.

    Thank you everyone.
  2. sebastian

    sebastian Active Member

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    A few of the things I like to do on the phone, like ball busting and cock slapping, obviously won't work here, but nipple play and some forms of pussy torture can be done fairly easily. Order her to do something mildly painful, like pinch a nipple and then gradually increase the intensity. Make her do it more frequently, or with more pressure, or make her start and tell her she can't stop until you give her permission to. This can be amazingly delicious. She's torturing herself purely because you have told her to, so she could stop at any moment but only by being disobedient. This will probably give you a real feeling of control over her. As the discomfort rises, she will start begging you for permission to stop. Be mean--say no. Be capricious--say yes but then immediately change your mind. Be persuadable--tell her that if she begs nicely enough you'll let her stop. As she begs, tell her she needs to be more desperate--you need to hear in her voice how badly she needs to stop.

    Another tip--be specific. This enhances control. Don't tell her to pinch her nipple. Tell her to grab her right nipple between her thumb and forefinger and start to dig the nails in. Or whatever. Reduce her freedom of choice as much as you can. This applies to everything about your play. So tell her you want her wearing a specific outfit or particular shoes--she should call you back when she's wearing it. Tell her where you want her to be sitting when she calls. And so on.

    Order her to do something and take a picture with her cellphone to send to you. Once she's done that, threaten to send the picture to your friends. But be cautious here. Remember that pictures sent over the internet or cell phones can live forever, so either make sure the pictures aren't explicit, don't show her face, or are only mildly embarrassing. Or say you'll send them and then lie about it.

    Also, work on using your voice in a very sensual way. She can only hear you, so your voice is the primary tool you have to work with. Speak slowly. Speak in a lower register. Growl. Get yourself aroused and start panting or speaking more urgently to show how turned on you are. Practice by yourself first until you get over any embarrassment. Remember that since she can only hear you, her imagination is going to be working overtime to fill in the blanks, so she'll mentally make up for many of the deficiencies in your technique.

    Depending on what turns her on, verbal abuse works well over the phone. So call her a filthy whore or a dirty slut, or worthless cunt or a kinky bitch or whatever language gets you and her going. Taunt her for abusing herself simply because you told her to. Tell her that a normal woman would never do this stuff and she's a freak.

    In a very different vein, make her describe one of her fantasies to you, in excruciating detail--what she's wearing, what she wants to do, etc. Or describe one of your fantasies to her--what you would do to her if she was with you. Play the scene out with her, so that the two of you are doing the appropriate dialog. Just basic phone sex can be really hot if you get good at it. Be extremely detailed and appeal to all her senses. "Then I'd slide your stocking off your left leg. You would feel the fabric gliding over your skin. I'd start running my moist, hot mouth up your calf, gently nibbling as I did so." It can feel a like awkward until you get really comfortable with it. But one of my most intense sexual experiences came during a phone call when the guy I was playing with simply took control of the scene from the start--it felt like he was raping me and I loved it. My mouth went dry.

    Good luck. I hope this helps.
  3. QuietTouch

    QuietTouch New Member

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    Very helpful! I appreciate the advice and can definitly have a few more ideas of what to say going into it. Thank you very much.

    Anyone else have some advice? I'm always willing to learn :)

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