Need advice

Discussion in 'General BDSM discussions' started by bmmc, Nov 25, 2008.

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  1. bmmc

    bmmc New Member

    Let me start by saying I am very new to the dom/sub thing.
    The problem I'm having is the girl I am dominating says the only way she will be completely under control is if I hit her in the face. She says this will cause fear and make it easier for her to obey me. I've never hit a woman before and do not believe you should, and from what i've read it sounds like these types of relationship should not be based on fear. However, I have been having a mostly good time with this girl and want the relationship to continue. Does anyone have a good idea of what I can do in this situation?
  2. nix

    nix Guest

    Be very gentle to start with, and be certain at every step that you are talking it through and doing everything in a way that you're both comfortable with.
    Make sure it is understood that you're doing this as part of erotic play between the two of you, not as an abusive behavior. When you're both comfortable with it and understand where the line between the two things lies, then you can start to build it into scenes etc and let it just become another aspect of your play.

    Most importantly, tell her that you're nervous about it but willing to try because she wants to. Let her know she's important to you! Make sure you're open with each other and that you're communicating well, and you should be just fine!
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