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This is a pretty good idea, Stanley, assuming that they feel ok with the social aspect of it. There's certainly a number of ways he can play around with the scenario. For example, during the dinner party he can occasionally just whisper in her ear that she's a slut. Or before the party he can tell her something like "whenever I straighten my tie (or fidget with my wedding ring or whatever), I'm thinking about what I'm going to do to you when we get home". He can play footsie with her under the dinner table, or maybe just give her a quick grope when no one's looking or make meaningful eye contact occasionally, to keep her a little on edge.
But what if the dinner party idea doesn't appeal to him? It's a little bit bold, because there's a hint that others at a party might figure out what's going on (even if it's unlikely). So let's give him other options.
Stanley is right is that a day of power exchange (and that's what BDSM really is, voluntary power exchange) is going to be difficult for two people who've never done it before. So it is probably best to start with just some bedroom play (unless your wife says that she likes the idea of doing domestic service--in that case, you can spend a day giving her chores to do, telling her what to make for dinner, and things like that).
I'm going to assume that you've read through the Newcomer's FAQ. if you haven't, go and do that right now. I'll wait.
Ok, now that you've done that, you should have at least a language with which we can discuss things. So, as Stanley suggested, sit down with her and ask her to tell you what scenes she liked about the book, and what she liked about them. The reason this is important is BDSM isn't just one thing. There are four inter-related spheres. And just because she likes one sphere doesn't mean she's gonna like the others. Just because she likes being spanked doesn't mean she wants to be tied up, or vice versa. So you need to get a sense of what is turning her on about that book.
You might want to read through the thread about 50 Shades. Most BDSMers are of the opinion that it's not really about a BDSM relationship; it's about a woman in love with a selfish asshole. The woman who wrote it doesn't seem to know much about actual BDSM. But it's pointing the way to BDSM for those who have an undiscovered kinky side to them, so it's doing some good.
Once you've found out what parts of the book turn her on, think about how to create a scene that looks like that. If she tells you that she likes the idea of getting spanked, plan to spank her. If she likes the idea of being held down during sex, do that. Does she like the idea of being called names? Plan to call her a slut, a bitch, a whore, and so on.
Be sure to use basic safety precautions, as discussed in the Newcomer's FAQ. If she wants bondage or pain, read up on how to do beginning play safely and don't try to do too much your first time. Above all, make sure you give her a safe word to stop play if she's not enjoying it ('red' is the classic one). Your wife might the like fantasy of fighting unsuccessfully--she might want to say no when she means yes, so both of you need the safe word to help you know if she really wants to stop.
Here's something important to understand about 50 Shades, and about actual BDSM. Very few submissives actually want a dom who is a truly selfish asshole who doesn't care about their needs. They may like the illusion of that, but they don't want the real thing. So you wife is not asking you to be a complete prick to her. In 50 Shades, the female lead falls in love with a man who is a selfish asshole who really abuses her, but she can see underneath that he is an emotionally damaged man that she thinks she can save. So part of what your wife is probably responding to in the book is the combination of a man who treats her aggressively but who underneath that is not a real asshole. And genuine BDSM can be a vehicle for emotional bonding between dom and sub. So when you're domming her, you can present yourself as an asshole (if that's the sort of dom you want to be), but you need to offer her some sense of emotional connection. That connection might just be snuggling when you're done, or it could be a transition to romantic sex at some point after you've been playing for a while, or it could be you praising her for getting spanked or telling her you like what she's letting you do to her. But keep that principle in mind--she probably wants some sense of emotional connection with you at some point during or right after you play.
Just as important to understanding what she wants is understanding what you want out of this. Presumably you are interested in trying your hand at domming, since you came here and asked for help. So what turns you on about being dominant?
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