Molestation (I think?!)

Discussion in 'General fetish discussions' started by spacegirl, Jul 16, 2010.

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  1. spacegirl

    spacegirl New Member

    Molestation.. I think (New and need some help please?!)

    I guess I've come here to try to figure out what exactly my fetish is.

    I always play out the same scenarios in my head but I can't quite put my finger on exactly what it is in them that's doing it for me. As you can imagine, this makes it stupidly hard for me to explain to my partner what I'd like him to do.

    Sometimes I'm younger than I am, say 11 or 12 but that's not always the case. It's always an older man, no younger than late 30s (parent's friend, man on an empty bus, etc.) and he always kind of 'comes on to' me in a way that I'm naive and he's taking advantage. So he'll say really dirty things to me but in a disguised way (for example, if he was making me perform oral sex he wouldn't say anything like 'suck my cock' it would be something to 'trick' me I guess) and always, always feel me up and put his hand up my skirt, etc. It's always in a very 'pervy' way and of course he always wants to make me cum!! Haha.

    If anybody can help me expand on this to help me understand it a little more or give me any ideas that would allow me to explain it better to my partner then I would be eternally grateful.

    Thank you.
     
    Last edited: Jul 17, 2010
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  2. sebastian

    sebastian Active Member

    Spacegirl, I'm not sure there is an exact name for what you're fantasizing about, but it combines several classic elements. Part of what's going on here is infantilization; you like being treated like a child (not a baby, but as a pre-teen). This is a common idea for submissives; you want to be controlled, and in this case, the control element is that the dom is older and cleverer than you. You also like the idea of not being a fully-willing participant (you want to be tricked into it); many subs like the fantasy of being forced or raped. You might also enjoy costume play (wearing a school-girl outfit or babydoll dress). I think there's also an element of violated innocence here, which seems to be common among female subs.
     
  3. spacegirl

    spacegirl New Member

    Thank you so much. I can start to explore things a little better now you've given me a few names for things!

    I've always been a sub and known that I love to be dominated, I've just never been able to put my finger on exactly what it is that I like and what kind of domination it is that does it for me (if that makes sense?!)

    Now to build up the courage to discuss this with my boyfriend!
     
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  4. sebastian

    sebastian Active Member

    If this interests you, you might start with the costume element. Many straight guys get into the fantasy of the schoolgirl with her short pleated skirt, tight sweater, and mary janes. If he enjoys that, then see if he will build it into a scene where he's taking advantage of you or disciplining you for being bad (naughty schoolgirl needs to be spanked by the strict teacher).
     
  5. spacegirl

    spacegirl New Member

    He has said in the past that he'd love it if I dressed up as a school girl so maybe we're on the same wave length? Thanks!
     
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  6. sebastian

    sebastian Active Member

    So dress up in costume and play with him, without telling him that you want him to dom you. See where he wants to take it. If he tries to spank you or treat you like a teenager, play into it. Once you're done, talk about what he liked and what you liked and suggest other things you'd like to try.
     
  7. spacegirl

    spacegirl New Member

    I went for it and told him everything last night, Sebastian!

    We decided that we're going to go with the schoolgirl thing but we aren't going to even attempt my 'ultimate' fantasy as it's far too specific and we don't want to kill it.

    Thanks for your help.
     
  8. sebastian

    sebastian Active Member

    Cool! Glad I could help. Let us know how it goes.
     
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