I had this super long descriptive email wrote and my phone died so I'll jus go with the short to the point version. I've been reading and researching constantly for the last couple weeks (newcomer FAQ, various threads and Wiseman's site). My fiancÃ©e (sub) and I (Dom) are very new to BDSM. She enjoys humiliation, degradation, and verbal abuse. The problem I seem to run into is I tend to use the same phrases ( dirty bi***, filthy sl**, disgusting wh***....) and then mentally I get down on myself for not performing a better scene. I guess what I'm looking for is advice on the best way to learn how to b a great Dom ( and do a great rape scene).. Do u have any websites, books etc.... That would help me to get more info on this? I'm downloading S&M 101 today and had looked thru various threads to find what I'm looking for but can't seem to find exactly what I want. Would you recommend finding an online mentor or do u think it jus goes back to simple communication?