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Ok, so let me see if I understand this. You did a session with a dominant woman, and since then you've been feeling very nervous about social contact with other people because you feel like they can see that you're submissive? And you're worried about running into the domme? Because she would expect you to be submissive toward her in public? And this sudden social phobia interfered with your job so much that you were fired as a result? Have I got this right?
It sounds to me like the submissive play that you did opened up some sort of deeply-repressed anxiety you had. The BDSM didn't cause the problem itself, but it helped the problem surface, because it allowed you to get in touch with personal issues you've never acknowledged before. BDSM often involves exploring parts of one's personality that have been kept hidden. You allowed yourself to feel the submissive side of you, and now you either are scared of that submissive side or you like it so much that you want to stay in that submissive place.
So one thing to realize that even though you now can access that submissive part of you, other people cannot magically see it. It might feel obvious to you that you're submissive, but it is not obvious to others (unless you're running around in a gimp suit asking people to kiss their boots). Gay people frequently remark on how straight people can be oblivious to gayness (for example, how did anyone not realize that Liberace and Paul Lynde were gay?), and the same is true of vanilla people and kinkiness--they will often completely miss even obvious signs of submissiveness in a person (that's why people are always so shocked when someone admits to being kinky--it completely violates the normal social face that people see). So, act normal when you go out (even if you want to act submissive) and most people will never even imagine that you're submissive inside. It's possible that a few closet kinksters might recognize the subtle signs of submissiveness, but they won't shame you or reject you--they'll see you as a kindred spirit.
And half-way sane domme will understand the need for discretion in public. So if you run into Madame X at the grocery store, she's not likely to demand that you kneel in the freezer aisle. She might smile at you or give you a subtle sign that she recognizes you, but she won't cause a scene. And if she's a prodomme or otherwise very experienced, she may completely ignore you, on the assumption that you don't want her to make any contact at all. If, by some chance, she's stupid and thinks you're going to serve her in public, you're entirely within your rights to ignore her and let her make a fool out of herself. But, if you're really not sure, send the domme an email and just explain that if you meet her in public, you're going to pretend you don't know her.
But it sounds like your anxiety is bigger than the advice that we can offer you here. We're just amateurs, offering guidance where we can. If your anxiety has caused you to lose your job and has seriously disrupted your life, I think you need to find a trained therapist to speak to about your anxieties. BDSM didn't suddenly create this problem; it was just the catalyst for deeper issues to come out. So find counseling and explore what the deeper issues are. You can, of course, keep posting here, but I think you need professional assistance.
So
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