I've recently moved in with my partner, I love him to bits, I want to marry him and have his children, we have discussed both and its what we both want. (In the future anyway, not financially able to have children at the moment and I want to go to uni next year). However I have an itch. I've always had this itch since I've started having relationships, well even before then. Its mainly sexual but does reach into my everyday life too. I want to hand over the control I have (over myself and my situation etc) to someone else. Not completely, I still want to choose what I wear and when I pee sort of things! But like in the bedroom, I want to be tied up or told what position to put myself in or told what to do and if I dont obey I want to be punished. I want my partner to have complete control over my body when we have sex. I want to be his, I want to be his possession and I want to serve him. I want a Master. But I cant. Not at least with my current partner, he has bipolar disorder and giving him such control over me would cause all sorts of problems, certainly if he was manic. Obviously I could protest and say no but if he is in the mindset that he has control over me when he is manic it could go horribly wrong. I've met someone however that can scratch my itch so to speak. He is very much a Dom, would take the control from me (with my permission) and would love me, respect me and care for me as well. We get on really well, he has all the qualities I look for in a guy and that. I see a future with my partner though, a good future with children and happiness. I dont think I should give up what I have, certainly as I love my partner to bits. I dont know how to go about attempting to scratch my "itch" with my partner though. I know I should talk to him but he's never very good with talking about emotions. I'm just so frustrated!!! Can I be truely happy in a relationship where I cant be exactly as I want?