Sparrow69
Moderator
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yet you still seem to associate with the need to instill fear. its not about instilling fear, and anyone who uses fear as a tool to control someone, while they may call themselves a dominant, is nothing more then a bully. You have a lot to learn my friend. I'm not saying you will never be a dom, but your going to wind up in jail or hurt if you insist on the need for fear in your relationships.
Fear has nothing to do with punishments, so to cut someone loose because you cant see yourself instilling fear, is ludicrous. I've not once, in 14, going on 15 years used fear to control a sub, and in that time I've disciplined MANY who have gotten out of line. Sometimes people work together, sometimes you just have to let someone go, but from what you've said, you only viewed one option when examining dicipline in general and that was to instill fear. You cannot use fear and expect good things to come, let alone a lasting relationship. It's about respect, and respect isn't gained with fear, complacency is. You need to take a long hard look in the mirror and ask yourself would you rather spend your life in empty meaningless short lived relationships where people do things because they are afraid of you, or do you want a bountiful lasting relationship(s) where people do things because making you unhappy would in turn make them unhappy.
Fear has nothing to do with punishments, so to cut someone loose because you cant see yourself instilling fear, is ludicrous. I've not once, in 14, going on 15 years used fear to control a sub, and in that time I've disciplined MANY who have gotten out of line. Sometimes people work together, sometimes you just have to let someone go, but from what you've said, you only viewed one option when examining dicipline in general and that was to instill fear. You cannot use fear and expect good things to come, let alone a lasting relationship. It's about respect, and respect isn't gained with fear, complacency is. You need to take a long hard look in the mirror and ask yourself would you rather spend your life in empty meaningless short lived relationships where people do things because they are afraid of you, or do you want a bountiful lasting relationship(s) where people do things because making you unhappy would in turn make them unhappy.
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