i need hints,tips,n trix on how 2 b a better master

Discussion in 'General BDSM discussions' started by fr3sh3st_3l3m3nt, Dec 15, 2009.

  1. fr3sh3st_3l3m3nt

    fr3sh3st_3l3m3nt New Member

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    I've been a Master 4 a lil over 6 months. I have 2 slaves. 1 is 30 n the other is 18.the older slave keeps acting up 4 attention. She also just acts out in general. I was wondering is their any tips out there that could help me keep my slaves inline better. So I won't have 2 worry about my younger following suite
  2. EZRA

    EZRA Member

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    I know if I was the older slave I would be very insecure, especialy with an 18 year old with her tight little body running around.
    SO I think she is acting up to get more attention and try to reassure her self your as interested in her as the younger one.
    My advice is to talk to her( out of contract) and make sure your not favoring one over the other. or this will implode.

    It's not my place but I can't help but ask ,are you sure your ready for 2 slaves?
  3. fr3sh3st_3l3m3nt

    fr3sh3st_3l3m3nt New Member

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    ready for 2 slaves?

    I'm not 2 sure,I'm so new 2 the master slave relationship in general. So I've just been riding the flow tryna learn as I go as far being a master goes. I wannna b a good master,I just wish there was some type of manuscript 2 read from. So my rules can b more structured n concrete. By the way my older slaves likes the the younger 1,so I'm not 2 sure if its a jealousy thing.
  4. EZRA

    EZRA Member

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    Liking the younger slave dose not rule out jealousy.
    It's not a personal thing.
    I know at least one person I like and I am jealous of.
    She might be jealous of the attention and not the slave.
    I think you should create a safe place for them to communicate with you outside of the Master/slave dynamic.
    One where they can air thier dislikes with out fear and without being disrespectful or disobedient.
    and one where it is confidential and what is said stay there.
    Last edited: Dec 16, 2009

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    Even if they like each other, it may still be a ploy for attention... Think of young girls acting up trying to get their parents attention. The sisters may love each other, but, they will still be jealous if mommy buys one a pretty new dress and not the other one...
  6. Sparrow69

    Sparrow69 Moderator

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    my advice, is to nt bite off more then you can chew. i know seasoned doms who still would not be able to handle and control 2 subs, let alone a dom who is so new to the lifestyle, that its only been a few months and they dont even know the dynamics or sociology behind the lifestyle they are trying to learn.

    I commend you on jumping in and taking the chance, thats a rare thing, but i think in this case, you need to re-evaluate your situation, learn some more about what it is your actually looking for and trying to accomplish, and then when you have some experience under your belt, start looking for a second sub.
  7. GreyMac

    GreyMac Member

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    You are 21 and one of your girls is 18. The one who is acting up is 30 and she feels positivley ancient compared to the other two of you. This is a highwire balancing act you are doing here. If you pay enough attention to the 30-year-old (lets call her '30') that she feels good about the realtionship, then '18' would have to be a very special person not to feel competitive. For there to be balance (in the mind of '30') you must always pay more attention to '30' because she is the one who feels most out of place. (each and every birthday will make this worse, by the way).

    If you pay that much extra attention to '30', '18' will always feel as though '30' is getting more attention and that's not fair. (and she will be right.)

    Three times I've been involved in 'threesome' relationships with two women together. One of those worked amazingly well. One was very short term and was about to self destruct when we all called it quits. The other one got really ugly in a big hurry.

    Good luck!
  8. fr3sh3st_3l3m3nt

    fr3sh3st_3l3m3nt New Member

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    I can respect that grey, but lets just say that 30 is only acting up cuz she liked 2 b punsihed... I wanna figure out a way 2 nstill fear within my slave. her nfatuations with punishment is making my job harder. n lastly your signature is great quote from Confucius

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    Instill fear? Somehow I don't think that's the best way to go about this. If she's trying to go after physical reactions from you, try to adjust your physical interactions. If she's going after the humiliation of punishment, find a way to bring humiliation into your relationship.
  10. EZRA

    EZRA Member

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    Punishment is attention.
    She is crying out for validation.
    I would listen to Grey and Sparrow if I were you.Between them they have a huge amount of experiance.
    As a sub my self, I have a hard time getting enough attention my self and their is only one of me for my Mistress.
    I have a friend who has maintained two slaves for many years, he once described it has having some one slowly and repeatedly stabbing tooth picks in to his hands.
    He is a Master Dom (for real) with something like 25 years of experiance.
    And it is a daily struggle for him.
    Don't let your ego get in the way, you have accepted responsibility for two human beings.
    Complicated, sensitive and needy, subs place great power in your hands.
    please be carefull.
  11. GreyMac

    GreyMac Member

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    The actual quote is: "Never argue with a fool; onlookers may not be able to tell the difference." and while it has been attributed to many different people, it is most often attributed to Mark Twain and does at least actually appear in his writings, which is where I first encountered it. I couldn't find any sources to support the Confucius statement but admittedly I didn't spend much time on it.

    It is such good advice, I try to heed it often...
  12. fr3sh3st_3l3m3nt

    fr3sh3st_3l3m3nt New Member

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    I feel like we're kind digressing from the issue, my older slave keeps acting up cuz she thinks that I can't handle her. N thats what I need help with. By the way innocent facade that is the koolest mask I ever seen.

    Ezra,I make time 4 both my slaves.I respect subs so i take care of both my slaves, but I'm on this website cuz I need help with disciplinary actions that my older kinky slaves wont Enjoy. I know alotta people think this is a lot 2 handle. I'm hearing concerns from both doms n subs, but isn't our secret society found on the ideas of pushing the boundries... I have the free time 2 give adaquete amounts of attention 2both... I just need tips from both subs n doms on how 2 work more effeciently
  13. GreyMac

    GreyMac Member

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    So what does she really like? Take that away from her until she can behave. If you just threaten it, or if you give it back too soon, she wins.

    If she's really, as you said, pushing you because she thinks you can't handle her, then what you do is HANDLE her. And you really don't want fear from a submissive, what you want is respect. A sub who fears you will soon leave you.

    I'd also suggest, since you are fairly new to the lifestyle, that you do some research on the difference between a submissive and a slave. Because '30' ain't nobody's slave....

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    My thoughts precisely.

    And thank you *insert name with 3's used as E's*. I have an absolute love for masks. This one is one of my favorites as well.
  15. fr3sh3st_3l3m3nt

    fr3sh3st_3l3m3nt New Member

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    Okay, now I'm down to 1 sub. kool,any websites or anybody that can help better understand my role as and a true nature if dom

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