Hi This is the very first forum I've looked at and now joined. I'd really like some advice from people experienced in BDSM. Forgive the length of this - I'd just like some genuine advice please. I'm in a relationship with a man who only recently revealed his interest in BDSM, fetishes, etc. It took 5 months for us to realise that we were both into the same things. He is naturally dom, me sub. It was a beautiful and exhilerating moment to discover this about each other and we had a fantastic time, discovering each other's fantasies and secrets. I had never done anything remotely fetishistic in any other relationship so this was brand new to me - and very exciting, as it was so intense and loving. He was relatively new to BDSM but had dabbled very lightly a few times in it - eg light spanking. The 'but' is that I have discovered that he has been discussing what we get up to in great detail with a female friend who is a very experienced sub, asking where to purchase equipment, etc. I feel betrayed and very hurt because I thought that we were discovering things together. Instead there is a third party involved - both of them 'getting off' on their chats about me. Am I over-reacting? Should I accept this? Because of the very strong emotional connection I have with him, I feel that what he has done is unforgivable. I'm not naive I'm just desperately desperately hurt.