First time used

Randomguy86 · Jun 30, 2011

Hi everyone

This is my first post on here. Just wanted to say hi, im a 25/m and my g/f used me for a sex slave the other night for the first time and I loved every second of it.

Just wanted to tell someone as Im too shamed to let my g/f know how much I actually enjoyed it.

Hopefully reading other peoples experiences on here will give me the courage to speak up and hopefully explore more with my g/f.

Anyway, thanks for listening and am looking forward to some great reading and meeting other people with similar tastes.

sebastian · Jun 30, 2011

Welcome to the forum! Don't be shy; post here and join the conversation.

And if you've been reading the posts, you'll be able to guess what I'm about to say: you need to talk to your gf and let her know what you enjoyed and what you didn't enjoy. Good healthy bdsm requires communication. You already know that she enjoys bdsm to some extent, so she's unlikely to freak out when you tell her you enjoyed yourself, and if you haven't said anything, she might misinterpret that and decide you didn't like it and that you don't want to do it again. So speak up!

kajmir · Jun 30, 2011

"You already know that she enjoys bdsm to some extent, so she's unlikely to freak out when you tell her you enjoyed yourself, and if you haven't said anything, she might misinterpret that and decide you didn't like it and that you don't want to do it again. So speak up!"

-Nods Violently-

chaoticist · Jul 1, 2011

Definitely tell her you enjoyed it. If you have some really far out fetish, then maybe keep quiet about it for a while - but you have to tell her you loved what happened, and listen to how she felt also. And most importantly, set up a repeat

It took me quite a while before I became totally open about my sexual preferences, but once I did, things just got so much easier. I started by telling my gf of the time, she was a bit surprised, but reacted well, and actually admitted to having some curiosity about trying some mild bdsm things too - so that worked out good. After that, I was just open with everyone I dated, after the first few dates and some level of attraction and interest developed. Contrary to my expectations, I found quite a lot more women were open to some of these things than I had expected, and more than a few times, I scored precisely *because* I was openly kinky - you'd be surprised how many women are fascinated by that stuff and want to try some of it, if they know you lean that way, they're more likely to approach you or drop some pretty heavy hints.

So, I'd strongly recommend being more open and communicative. If you are nervous, just open up one step at a time, and if it goes well, move onto the next step. That way you don't risk too much. Shame is there to be blown up and destroyed in spectacular fashion - living shamelessly is far more fun

Ceilidh · Jul 1, 2011

Yes randomguy! Talk to your gf!

I know talking about this subject is difficult, but isn't the best things in life worth it? And since she is the one who treated you like a sex slave you already know she is into this. So to speak the ball is in your court.

Here is some ideas on what to say:
"I really enjoyed it when you (fill in blank with something she did when you were her sex slave)"
Or as you are in the act ask her to tie you down or something specific.

Just don't be afraid to ask for what you want. I ask my other half all the time to tie me down, because I love it. I love being at his mercy and never knowing what he will do to me next.

Randomguy86 · Jul 1, 2011

Hey everyone

Thanks for the warm welcome and advise : )

I think next time we do something I will ask for her to tie me up! She even did something that she wasnt game enough to do for ages during our last time which I hope means that she liked what we were doing heaps and made her comfortable enough.

Think I might keep my deepest to my myself for a while yet. hahaha. Don't want to freak her out : (

Just curious if there are any other male subs my age on here?

Ceilidh · Jul 1, 2011

I may not be a male. But I was the same age as you when I discovered my submissive side.

And even though that was over a year ago we haven't been able to explore veryuch or often due to living arrangements and my health.

Another thing is even though you are the sub, tell her when she does something you like. It will give her confidence in what she us doing. Also I suggest lots of research and learn how to be safe!! You don't want anything going numb while you are tied up. And do not hesitate to let her know if anything doesn't feel right.

Randomguy86 · Jul 1, 2011

Its funny. I thought for ages that I had top tendencies but recently i have been wanting more and more to be dominated to the point where its pretty much all i think about. lol. Wish my partner had the same sex drive though : (

Just a random thought....

Randomguy86 · Jul 4, 2011

Do you think it's more common for men or women to be submissive? Or equal?

Still haven't progressed any furthur with gf. Been hinting heaps though : (

Do people still have sex after having kids? Hahaha. Just kidding but really how many times a week does everyone else have sex that has kids?

Smallest · Jul 4, 2011

I've heard it's more common for men, but I'd say about equal.

You should probsbly go past just hinting. And I think there was a thread called 'Sex after baby' or something a month ago, I'll look for the link.

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