I was wondering if any of you might have some suggestions for getting my husband to open up about his fantasies. He is one of those "strong, silent" types, and while over the years he's made a lot of progress in opening up, I can't get him to talk about his fantasies. The only one he has ever told me about is a threesome, although, after some discussion, he came to the conclusion that he would rather it remain a fantasy, it's not something we'll be doing. The last time we discussed this (a few night ago) he told me he doesn't have any fantasies - none (save the 3some). He then turned the conversation to my fantasies. This is how the conversation typically goes. I'm finding it hard to believe though, that he doesn't have any fantasies. Everyone does, don't they? So, being the over analytical person that I can sometimes be, I began to wonder why he won't tell me about them. I'm wondering if A) they are tamer than mine and he feels odd bringing them up, or B) they might be heavier/kinky but he's not sure how I'll respond to them. I haven't given him the full scope of my fantasies because, if you'll remember, he was initially pretty turned off by the idea of pain play. I'm trying to tread lightly, I don't want to scare him off by coming right out with it all. However, these past couple of weeks, he has become significantly rougher in the bedroom, including the much harder spankings and the choking scene I wrote about on another thread. I brought up the fantasies, because I'm trying to get a feel for what he's craving and how far we can push things. I don't just want to lay out my nipple clamps (which, btw, he doesn't know about) and his belt and ask him to use them on me.