Different levels of pain

Discussion in 'General BDSM discussions' started by flipm, Nov 8, 2012.

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  1. flipm

    flipm New Member

    Hi everybody,

    I am not very experienced with BDSM and I am currently trying to put together my sublist. I am very interested in trying out things but, since I do not have a lot of experience, I am not sure I could handle everything.

    Therefore I would like to ask you for some help in evaluating the pain caused by different BDSM treatments. I know this may be different for everybody, and also depends on the intensity of the treatment, but maybe you could give me an intuitive idea about which treatments you would qualify as most painful, or arrange the treatments from least to most painful:

    - small needle through nipple
    - anal devirginization
    - nipple clamps
    - nipple clamps with electroshocks
    - electro dildo in ass
    - violet wand treatment
    - pinwheel on nipples or penis
    - candle wax on nipples or penis
    - figging
    - paddling

    Any help would be most appreciated!
     
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  2. sebastian

    sebastian Active Member

    These are fairly different sensory experiences, so I'm not sure they can really be arranged in a meaningful hierarchy. A couple thoughts to help you:

    1) Most subs distinguish between stinging pain and thudding pain. This is most applicable to flogging, but it applies to most forms of impact. As the names imply, stinging pain is sharp and often most narrow, whereas thudding in dull and more spread out. Think of the difference between a rubber band snapping (stinging) vs a wide leather strap striking your butt (closer to thudding). Many subs express a preference for one or the other, while some like (or dislike) both.

    2) Different body parts have different thresholds of pain. For example, I have a fairly high threshold on my tits--I often have to tell guys they can be harsher on my tits--but my balls can be very sensitive--get even a little too rough and I get a nauseous feeling in my guts almost immediately. But recently I had someone tug on my balls without eliciting that feeling, so perhaps I like ball tugging more than ball squeezing. And that's another distinction that male subs often make--tugging vs squeezing.

    3) Electro pain, in my fairly limited experience, is quite a different sensation from any other pain. It's sort of tingly. The once or twice I've experienced it, I haven't liked it at all, even at a very low setting. But other guys love it.

    4) How much pain a sub can handle is often dependent on how the pain is applied. If I grab your tit and dig my fingernails in with no lead up, I will probably leave you howling in pain very quickly. If, on the other hand, I go slowly, starting with gentle rubbing and pinching and slowly increasing the level of force and aggression, I might be able to get you to writhe with pleasure for quite some time. So there's a big difference in pain that is worked up to and pain that is applied quickly. Some subs may enjoy sharp, rapid pain, but they're more hardcore. As a novice, start with gradual, sensually applied pain.

    5) The nerves that carry pleasure are the same ones that carry pain, but they can only carry one at a time. Pain play works by getting the nerves firing pleasure signals and then shifting the sensation over to pain, which results in the body reading pain as pleasure. This generally requires mild stimulus first, slowly increased in force, alternated with pleasurable feelings. For example, when you spank or paddle a boy's ass, you periodically stop spanking and gently caress the ass and give it mild stimulation, before you return to spanking. So again, how the pain is applied is as important as what sort of pain is involved.

    6) Your first time doing anal sex will involve some discomfort, as your sphincter protests something going in rather than coming out. If you do regular anal training with a plug or dildo, your sphincter may get used to this, but there may always be a little discomfort right at the start unless you gently open the sphincter prior to fucking. This pain is not pleasant, at least not in my experience. It's pain to be gotten around by relaxation, gentle stimulus, and going slow, rather than pain that gets transformed into pleasure. But once the sphincter gets relaxed and the cock goes all the way in, that pain goes away; if it doesn't there's a problem and you should probably stop playing. That pain is pretty much the only pain that anal play should produce; the nerves in the rectum and lower colon aren't set to process pain the way your skin and muscles are. I've never experienced an electro probe in the ass, so I can't speak to how that sensation compares to the pain in the sphincter, but I've been told that it's more of an intense sensation than pain per se. Your mileage may vary. So again, these two forms of pain are not really comparable.

    7) Some forms of pain go away the moment you take the stimulus away. If you hit your limit on tit play, the dom can take the clamps off and after a momentary surge of pain, the pain declines very quickly. If your ass gets too sore, the dom can simply stop playing. With other forms of pain, such as figging or candle wax, you can't turn the sensation off right away--it takes a while for the ginger juice to get absorbed or the wax to cool. So that means that you need to be a more experienced pain sub before you start exploring those types of play. You need to know how to manage pain a little before you jump into them, because otherwise you might stumble into a very unpleasant experience. Learn to walk before you try running.

    The take-away from this is that you shouldn't be thinking of a hierarchy of pain so much as a buffet of pain. Try a little of this and a little about that and gradually figure out what you enjoy, what you don't, and where your thresholds lie. Try low levels of pain first (light impact, gentle tit play) before you go to harsher things like heavy flogging. Start with things on the surface of the body before you experiment with invasive things like figging and electro probes. Needles are more extreme, so leave them for later. Figging is a form of chemical play and is therefore in its own category; again leave it for later. Learn the basics of anal play before you start exploring anal pain. Remember, you have a lifetime to play in this playground, so go slow and savor the experiences.
     
  3. - small needle through nipple
    Very painful. Also you need to be really, really aware of hygiene for anything that breaks the skin.

    - anal devirginization
    Moderate. Depends on how large the object is that's being inserted. For small dildos it it quite pleasant if you follow the guidelines.

    - nipple clamps
    Depends on the clamp. From quite mild to really painful.


    - nipple clamps with electroshocks
    You need to be REALLY careful about nipples and electricity. I would look for explicit safety advice on electric play. The general rule is keep electricity "below the waist". But if you Google "Tazapper" this device is supposed to be safe to use on nipples. It's pretty painful on sensitive areas.

    - electro dildo in ass
    Because the shock level is variable you can say that it can be "pleasant" at the low end through to "intensely painful" at the high end.

    - violet wand treatment
    I haven't tried this.

    - pinwheel on nipples or penis
    Depends on how hard it's pressed in, and there's some variation in the sharpness of the spikes.


    - candle wax on nipples or penis
    You need to use the proper candles. I don't do wax play because I'm too hairy :)


    - figging
    I'm not familiar with that.


    - paddling
    Lots of variation in this. A wide, rubber paddle with a light stroke is not too bad. A heavy wooden paddle with a hard strike is wicked.


    Hope this helps.

    Cheers,
    Stanley
     
  4. flipm

    flipm New Member

    Thanks very much for the very interesting replies!
    You gave me some very interesting insight, things I had never thought of.

    Yes, I will be careful and go step by step. I am just very interested in everything and I would like to try out everything.

    I am surprised that needles can be experienced as very painful. Maybe because they are in a sensitive area? I have always thought of the needles I have experienced during an injection at the doctor, which I did not find painful at all.
     
  5. Hippie-Sadist

    Hippie-Sadist New Member

    Well all I can really say is that I'm curious about the electro things as well so not much of a help there. As for the pinwheel, it's an interesting feeling. From time to time I allow my pet some minor play time with her Master so I end up with little red dots over my body from the pin wheel. I did not personally enjoy it on my penis but then again everyone is different. I liked it around my hips and inner thighs. But just take it slow and build the pressure behind the pins to find out where you can take it and how hard.
    The figging thing, my sub and I just tried this recently. We used a cut ginger root the first time and used it vaginally. She held it in for about 30min before calling yellow and requesting me to remove it. About a week ago I made her cut a small piece of it off and simply press it against her anus, not actually penetrating, and hold it there. She texted me back (I was at work she was playing at home) less then 10min later and told me it was much worse then the vaginal. So I agree with the above post. Take it slow learn to build your pain tolerances, perhaps try other things similar to the figging. The burning sensation can also be created by using lots of other things. Toothpaste has become a favorite recently. We have also used slalsa, jalapeno juice(In a small quantity) or also icy hot. However Icy Hot will likely come after the figging. Once it's on, it lasts for a while. So maybe try using it in a place that's not as sensitive. I have my sub apply Icy Hot to her butt cheeks about an hour or so before I plan on giving her a good spanking.
    Just move slow, and enjoy it!
     
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