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Jackk, the problem isn't that 50 Shades is depicting abuse. The problem is that it's depicting abuse and calling it love and BDSM. These are really two separate problems.
1) There is a long tradition in Hollywood of depicting abusive or stalking behavior as 'romance'. To pick one example, in the Christian Slater movie Bed of Roses, he plays a florist who falls in love with a woman and starts sending her flowers, because he's too shy to talk to her (IIRC, he's grieving for a dead wife). One day she comes home and finds that he has broken into her apartment and filled it with flowers. The movie finds nothing wrong with this behavior--it's presented as a sign of his true love for her. Another minor example, in the Lionel Ritchie video for 'Hello' (from the mid-80s), Ritchie is in love with a blind woman. At one point he calls her up on the phone but says nothing when she answers. In both cases, the man's behavior would be extremely frightening to any actual single woman, but it is presented as just sweet love. 50 Shades is perpetuating a long tradition of such ideas.
2) Many actual abusers claim that what they are doing to their victims is simply consensual BDSM. There's a depressingly long list of cases in which men have persuaded women to agree to be slaves, and then proceeded to terrorize them, get them addicted to drugs, force them to star in porn films or photo shoots, injure them to the point of hospitalization or death, and so on. Many women who genuinely wish to explore submissiveness with men have found themselves in situations like this ought of naiveté or a misunderstanding of what BDSM is. And some BDSM advocates have argued that there is a hidden epidemic of rape within the BDSM community, with doms ignoring consent, renegotiating limits during the scene, and so on. 50 Shades is actively teaching naive women that rape and abuse are legitimately part of BDSM and thereby helping perpetuate these misconceptions and crimes.
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