Daddy vs. Master

Discussion in 'General BDSM discussions' started by bluelagoon1988, Sep 28, 2009.

  1. I have been doing some light reading and am starting to think that maybe I am interested in having a "daddy" Dom. I can't seem to figure out what the major differences are between daddy and it the level of responsibility? Is it the way they go about training you? Can I be a collared sub and still be daddy's little girl? I don't really like the age play though so I am really confused... help!
  2. master jey

    master jey Moderator

    as far as i know it means age play never had such a experience sumanai onegaishimasu
    Last edited: Sep 28, 2009
  3. subspace

    subspace Member

    I have a big Daddy fetish but it is simply a scene that I like to play out/role play not something I would want all the time even if it was an option.
    Unfortunately for me my Top will not go here with me so that forces me to use my imagination. Like you I too have been able to feed my need through stories and a little writing of my own.
    Usually having a Daddy Dom means you will be engaging in age-play. If you don't enjoy age play what is it that appeals to you about this? Even in the BDSM world a lot of people have a real issue with this sort of play so tread carefully and make sure you are clear with what you want.
  4. I think I really enjoy the tender care and guidance a daddy dom seems to give. A Master trains you and guides you but a daddy dom shapes your life. Maybe I am totally off base. I am naturally a childlike personality at times so I am struggling trying to find the balance here. I learn my lessons the best from verbal punishment and the disappointment from my Dom, not so much getting flogged, etc. I think I'll read more on this and try to get a few viewpoints.

    Why do you think people have an issue with this sort of play? Aren't we all of the same SSC creed? Thanks for your input subspace!
  5. My master is twice my age, so I guess it was natural for us to try the age play thing at some point. But it was a bit weird, because he doesn't act like a typical man of his age, and so 'feels' the same age as me, if that makes sense? :confused:

    Also, the actual 'daddy' play was a bit odd, too; we have done it a couple of times, but I'm not sure either of us are fully comfortable with it :confused:

    However, regarding the aspect of wanting/needing care, I can understand that completely. I can be a bit childlike at times, and also, I suffer with depression and serious confidence issues, so I do feel this need to be looked after and comforted.
  6. subspace

    subspace Member

    Unfortunately a lot of people involved in BDSM suffer from childhood abuse which can make playing out a Daddy fetish anything from awkward/uncomfortable to something that is too painful to touch. Some with past abuse issues surrounding family may however find this role play therapeutic others not at all.
    It has just been my experience that when this topic is brought up there is often a lot of controversy. People may argue that Daddy/daughter role play lacks the Sane part of the SSC rule. Have you noticed that in the stories you have read there are often disclaimers that the 'daughter' figure is 18, or they go to great lengths to explain that it is just fantasy whereas other types of fetish writing don't?
    The wanting and needing care is not exclusively found in Daddy Dom's of course, and most subs need this type of care regardless of their fetish. What is exclusive to a Daddy Dom is the age play, usually that is.

    Sometimes the best way to compromise on the need for age play is to role play as a young girl rather than a daughter.
    Good luck, have fun, and keep us posted!
  7. GreyMac

    GreyMac Member

    Well and clearly stated.
  8. Sub4Life

    Sub4Life Member

    I call my Master Daddy from time to time, but usually to tease him. Like when we are in public, if he has me close to him, I might whisper an "Oh Daddy." In his ear, but for me, it is never a father daughter thing, It just turns us on. lol.

    You don't need a Daddy dom for care though. My Master can be very harsh, but he is always there to hold me or make me feel better, or give me a stern talking too. Very much like a father I suppose, but without thinking of him as my father. I can't do that, because I could only think of my father. Eew. lol
  9. master jey

    master jey Moderator

    well you have to see my father and then you'll say eew

    we decided to try age play
    i'll play daddy first and then if i don't like it we'll try mommy XD
  10. Hmm...although my master and I have done some age play, I've never actually called him 'daddy'. I swore a very long time ago that I would never call anyone this (well, except my actual dad of course :D) as I really don't know if I could stomach that.

    However, this is coming out slightly in our non BDSM lives too. My master is very mischievous, and seems determined that we should fool someone into thinking we really are father and daughter :eek: We were at a motorbike dealership about a month ago, and he asked the assistant if I could try one of the bikes. When we were leaving, I was being all cuddly and affectionate, and we were getting some strange looks from the turned out that he had told the assistant I was his daughter :D
  11. ReallyGreen

    ReallyGreen Member

    "Daddy" and "Boy" monikers are leftovers from the gay men's Leatherbar scene. It never implied any actual familial relations then or now, its just another way to say D/s, Master/Slave, Top/Bottom, Pitcher/Catcher, et cetera et cetera et cetera. You don't even have to be male to be somebody's "Daddy" (Yes, I have met a Daddy & Boy lesbian couple).
  12. GreyMac

    GreyMac Member

    It may be more telling than us southerners would like to dwell on but belles have been calling their husbanbs 'Daddy' since before the Civil War.
  13. Sparrow69

    Sparrow69 Moderator

    this topic came up in another thread, which has a very solid description. It's late, and im tired, so i wont bother reposting it, but i will say that age has nothing to do with a daddy fetish.
  14. Thanks guys I think I am starting to figure out the boundaries for myself....I dont hate the age play but I dont want it on a daily basis, I think the part I am looking for is the major decision making. Where he makes all the major decisions in my life and helps me decide on minor ones. Not in a traditional Master/slave sort of way though....somewhere in the middle. I do like being talked down to in a gentle way which my Dom is very good at, He can make me pout or come close to tears without even raising His voice. It's hard to describe but it's so delicious.

    That's what I struggle with most, the things I need or really want but can't quite describe. Thanks again everybody for the input, your opinions help me to better explain my wants and needs.
  15. subspace

    subspace Member

    That I like!

    I had the opposite happen to me when out to dinner with my father and son. The waitress thought we were a married couple and that was needles to say awkward and less fun. Although my dad found it hysterical and said it was a compliment to him that someone would believe he could have a 'trophy wife'. :eek:

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