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I apologize in advance. I know I'm going to rant now. Too much caffeine.
I have two slaves. A male and a female one.
Your analytical approach reminds me of my male slave. You wouldn't happen to enjoy the instructions of a well laid out manual, too, would you?
In any case, no contact orgasms is a topic I more or less stumbled into. There was a time where I believed it a myth. Most submissives... if not all... who claimed to be able to cum by the power of thought alone were female. I thought, how convenient, that it is the sex that can so easily fake orgasms, and not the sex where there is concrete evidence of an orgasm, that claims to pull of this mythical feat.
That is, until I experienced the mind meld of deep, deep, power exchange.
Lets start with the biological possibility of it. You can find more detailed descriptions if you research the sex life of people with spine fractures. People that are paralyzed waste down. But here is what I can recall from memory.
There are two distinct nerve pathways that cause your cock to harden. One is triggered by physical stimulation, the other by mental stimulation. It can be seen that they are distinct pathways because depending on the location of spine damage one my be intact and the other one my no longer work.
A person who does not feel anything waste down may still be able to get hard and achieve a climax, it just takes internal mental stimulation.
What AnErieGuy was told seems to be very much on the mark. It is a question of intensity and "worth" of the thought, which is a question of mindset, and personality.
My female slave can cum on command, because she knows internally that I own her. That everything of her belongs to me. And when I exert my will over her she believes so hard in it that I can rip an orgasm from her with words. Or deny her. In her normal state she is highly orgasmic, because it is the mental component that is her primary way of arousal. She can cum within 5 seconds or less, even. When we were seperated and it looked like the relationship between us was over she tried to regain her own self in an act of rebellion, I guess you could call it. She tried to cum without my permission. She tried for an hour. Instead of reaching an orgasm using her Hitachi, the shower head, her own hand, all she reached was a state of dispair and panic.
I told her she could run, but not hide, for wherever she goes, I am deep inside her, pulling all the strings.
Leading up to this point were months of accidental conditioning. Trance states that we just sort of slipped into without realizing what they were. It all basically happened by itself. I was, and still largly am, completely dumbfounded by how it all clicked.
He, on the other hand, is of a completely different makeup. Using the broadest stroke possible, she is as introverted as he is extroverted. What lies within her is where her main focus of perception lies. What happens around him is where his focus of perception lies. What happens within her dictactes her actions. What happens around him dictates his.
I don't know if that is why he is so focused on the physical. He reaches a state of submission, a state of trance, only really through physical means. Through pain, subjugation, degredation, humiliation, objectification, but even then, he would never, ever, be able to cum on command.
It's not how he ticks.
I no longer believe that it is mainly a question of sex. It's a question of how you tick. Of how you perceive. Of where your focus lies, internally, or externally.
I guess, if you really understand what submitting your will to someone else means, if someone elses will becomes your will, if someone elses happiness becomes your own, if it feels like some sort of melding of the minds where your own will is simply washed away, then you're on the right track.
If not, then I guess, something you could try is targeted operant conditioning. Something like a command such as "cum for Master" being required before you are allowed to cum. Then, over time, over months, shorter and shorter time limits for how long you have to cum for Master without facing punishment. 1 minute, 30 seconds, 15 seconds, 5 seconds, instantanously.
Whatever you want to try, I'm sure there is no quick fix. Whatever you try, you will need patience, as it will take time to reach your goal.
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My master has told me that only at certain times I will be allowed to touch my penis and balls, but I am allowed to cum any time I want. And he has also told me that if I manage to cum without touching myself I will be rewarded. 
