Crucifixion Fetish or Fantasy

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wmrs2

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Here is an example of what I am looking for.

I had a girl friend once that said she had a crucifixion fantasy but did not have the nerve to play the role out. She often said that she wanted to know what it would be like to be crucified and kept asking me to play the role with her. She had never done anything like this before and had a fantasy that all she would have to do was have somebody to tie her to a cross and leave her there for awhile.The experience was totally different from her fantasy. She visualized it would be enjoyable as well as erotic.

Since it was her fantasy, she dictated all the terms of her bondage. She was to be gagged, tied with her arms straight from her body with little slack. It was to be a session and not an event. It would be her way or not at all. It would be done in the evening from one to six o'clock.

The first five minutes was painful but erotic so she handled the pain ok. The second five minutes she had an organism and was left with the shock of torture pending and it was no longer erotic. I left her there for about 30 minutes and insisted she come down from the cross which she was happy to do. It was not an experience she wanted to repeat but she still kept her fantasy but as a fantasy only.
 
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wmrs2

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More about this experience.

When her wrist were being tied to the cross, she was so excited that she almost fainted. She could hardly stand on the stool long enough to be tied. She was overcome with erotic feelings and thought her heart would explode.

When the stool was removed and she suddenly hung there, things changed quickly. She sucked air and could not exhale from the shock of the pain that attacked her arm pit, the burning was all the way down her arms and into her chest. The erotic expression on her face vanished and she knew her choice of a 5 hour session was a bad mistake. She cried and screamed into her gag. But she had dictated the terms.

She was still excited after five minutes but soon had an orgasm and the rest became real torture. The binding on her wrist and the pressure from her 110 lb. body caused blood to emerge from around the ropes. She had not really expected this and had not realized what a critical condition she had created. A good thing for her was that I made the decision to cut the session hours short of her wishes.
 
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nix

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Well, crucifixions are literally deadly. It killed the messiah of one third of the earth's population (I myself am an atheist) so I suppose it would do some damage to your friend.
I'd want to stand on something so it was more psychological than physical, and only for 5-10 minutes. Not that I have any drive to try it anytime soon; there are plenty of other things I'd rather do.
 
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wmrs2

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Why are you not interested in crux?

I would like to see more ladies participate in crux dialogue at least. You do not have to actually be hung on a cross to have this fantasy. Truly it is a painful practice but if you are into S&M, that is your thing. Look at the psychology of this fantasy. When my girl friend chose to hang on the cross, she visualized the erotic experience. She almost collapsed in preparation of the event. She imagined a 5 hr. session. She anticipated an experience like a hungry person putting too much on her plate. She did not know her cruciifer would have mercy on her when she decided it was too much. A masochist enjoys fear. What if she had not been released after 30 min.? She did not enjoy being crucified for 30 min., but the next time she said she wanted more time on the cross. What did that mean?
 
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wmrs2

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A CRUCIFIXION FANTASY

MY FRIEND jOHN'S GIRLFRIEND WAS CRUCIFIED BY jOHN. HERE IS WHAT SHE SAID ABOUT THE EXPERIENC.

A CRUCIFIXION FANTASY
What had I done? I never expected this type of pain!
From the beginning crucifixion appeared to be erotic and sexual.
That’s how I thought of it. It was something to be enjoyed throughout but the eroticism lasted only for about ten seconds. My idea of crucifixion was a true fantasy. In reality it was what it was intended to be – a very real torture.

When he fastened my wrist to the T cross, it was like a dream. I felt ashamed that I did not resisted him. But, this was what I wanted. From excitement and fear I fainted before he finished tightening the ropes. It was now too late to back out of this situation. This, however, was my first experience with any type of bondage. It makes one wonder why the choice was made to go so close to the edge. But, I had never had any interest in bondage save for this crucifixion fantasy. I had thoughts that the fantasy would be wonderful but it was nothing like the reality of the experience. The truth of this was being revealed to me as I lay there with my necked back to the cross. I was awakened by John pulling my arms straight along the T beam. As the ropes tightened on my wrists, the strain on my armpits had already begun. This was not going to be either fun or erotic after a short time of hanging there. The stress in my arms testified to this and the cross had not been lifted as yet.

Although I now sensed what this experience would be like, it remained erotic at first. I could not have resisted had I chose to do so. The realization that this was happening to me sucked all the strength from my body. I was completely limp, afraid of what I had subjected myself to. John told me that backing out was not an option after I decided to come to his place knowing what would occur. I could have stayed home but after having discussed being crucified so often with John, it seemed very unfair of me to consider backing out now.

John told me that he was not interested in bondage and that he was not interested in a suspension with safe words. Crucifixion was more than an event of suspension. It was a death sentence by the worst torture imaginable. Often having said to John, “I wonder what it would be liked to be crucified,†made the anticipated event larger and more erotic than reality. Although John cautioned me that I was putting more on my plate than I could eat, I did not allow this to soak in.

I actually did not realize what he was saying. Crucifixion was a long process that could last hours if not days. To know what it was like to be crucified, one had to approach death. To come off the cross after twenty minutes of suspension and the use of a safe word was not crucifixion. There was no safe word in crucifixion. When you have had all you could take, the torture began and you stayed on the cross until the end or at least near the end, which John called real edge play. But that would be the only way one could know what it was like to be crucified.

Laying there on the cross, realizing there was no turning back, my mind raced with thoughts to that which I had committed. This situation was completely out of character for me. How could I have been so foolish? My parents would never have thought that I would have volunteered to be tied naked to a cross and agree to suffer to almost death. John had gone to great efforts to make this experience as real as could be without actually killing me. He was not interested in the physical aspects of crucifixion. He said it was the psychology of torture that made torture what it was. Some people could withstand long periods of torture because they could turn pain into pleasure. This was easy to do with suspension on a cross, if you knew you would be coming down in a few minutes. But if you thought that you were going to die, that there was no end to your helplessness, and that you could not stop the pain, then this added to the torture. To know what it was like to be crucified evolved going past ones limits. In being crucified one would pray to die, would hope for death, and long to escape from the cross without any hope of doing so. As I thought of this, fear gripped my heart and I fainted again only to be awakened by the tightening of the ropes.

After I was securely fastened to the cross John pointed out that I had asked for this experience. He loved me and was going to grant my wish. He would make my crucifixion as real as possible. It was dead of winter, clouds in the sky and snow on the ground. It was cold in John’s large basement where I was being crucified. To make the experience real, John had purchased several large heat lamps. He explained that a hot sun was needed for a real crucifixion and that he had timers on the heat lamps to simulate day and night.

“You will get a real sun burn and the heat from the lamps will add to your thirst and desire for water.. You can keep track of time by suffering each day’s hot sun and each night’s chill.â€

These words horrified me as I began to realize that John had planned my torture to last for days. This was not what I wanted and it was not part of my fantasy but thinking back, it is what I agreed to. How could I have been so foolish? I truly began to panic!

I had never been physically punished by my parents. There was never a need to punish me since I grew up as a very well behaved child, spoiled and pampered, but well behaved. My parents raised me to be sensible, to use common sense, and to increase my self esteem with a good education. This crucifixion was the worst mistake in judgment that I had ever made. I began to realize this as John turned the pulley that was lifting my cross to an upright position. Panic intensified and guilt increased as I realized that I had violated the good upbringing that my parents had given me. Where did this lust for pain and pleasure come? Where did the idea that to be crucified would be enjoyable? There were no events in my background that would promote a desire for me to be punished in the manner in which I was about to be punished.

“Darling, after I get you up, I will explain more of what you are in for,†John said.

As the cross began to rise, my anticipation grew. What was in store for me was going to be terrible. The idea of this terribleness was worst than the pain that was growing in my arms but as the cross became straight, the pain beginning in my armpits became enormous. John quickly explained that the crucifier could increase the suffering of the victim by how the arms were fastened to the cross. The more the arms were fastened like a Y, then less the stress on the armpits. That was the part of the body that housed sensitive nerves going to the breast and down the arms to the wrest. To tie some one to the cross in a T formation was to increase the stress on the armpits making the experience of hanging on the cross thousands of times more intense. John had tied my arms straight to my sides with no slack. When the weight of my 110 lb. body pulled down, the pain shot through my body so strongly from the armpit that I hardly realized that I was fastened to the cross by my wrist.
 
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wmrs2

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The rest of the story

The first response was to open my mouth wide and grasp for breath. My eyes bulged from the shock of the initial pain. I could not exhale air because of the shock of what was happening to me. I could not scream! Tears flooded from my eyes! I went numb throughout my chest and felt sick throughout my abdominal region. I waned to faint to escape the surge of pain that shocked my body and jumped suddenly to my brain. Simultaneous before I could take a second breath, panic and fear squeezed my chest tight. My normal size breasts were very hard with blood pressure building in them. What have I done, I thought?

As I hung there, too scared to move, the pain in my arms and wrists began to become real to me. My armpits were dripping perspiration and dripping to the floor. With all this wetness my armpits were on fire as the tendons and muscles stretched at the weight of my body. How could I have been so dumb to think crucifixion was erotic?

Crucifixion pain is like this. You do not get use to it. You may adjust but it does not become less intense. It accumulates and becomes something more intense. You can not adjust to deal with it fast enough. Give up any hope of becoming comfortable as the pain stays well ahead of any psychological adjustment your body makes.

I finally began to breath. I screamed and cried. I pulled on my ropes which made them cut into my wrists and drops of blood came from around the ropes. John began to explain my situation, as he had promised.

“There is no comfortable position and I urge you to save your strength by not screaming and squirming. It will do you no good. There is no hope that you will be coming down until the crucifixion is complete. We did not use nails to fasten you to the cross. This was not a favor to you as it lengthens the time you will be on the cross. The timers on the heat lamps have been turned on for several hours and the basement is about 105 degrees where you are. There are several hours of assimilated daylight left. I am afraid that your beautiful pink skin will be damaged but that is part of crucifixion. You will want water. Give up the idea that your thirst will be quenched. You will reach the edge quicker this way. The edge will come to you in at least three days this way.â€

The heat from the lamps was torturous. It was difficult to breath. It seemed that time slowed. After ten minutes or so, I had adjusted enough that I remembered why I was here. It was the thought of eroticism that drove me to this point. As I thought about this I felt myself becoming wet and aroused. This sexual feeling also built until I had a climax and a sexual frenzy. After the climax passed, the crucifixion took on a more painful stage as if I was being punished for having a thrill during my suffering. I longed for these sexual feelings to return as this made my suffering more tolerable. But, this was not to be. I was ready to come down from the cross but as John said there were no safe words and no stopping the process. Things were getting worse and the pain was growing as hope vanished and fear replaced it.

I realized the reasons that I submitted to the cross as I hung there. This might have been the first time that I admitted that I was lonely and depressed much of my life. Depression is a physical thing that affects the mind. Wanting to suffer does not help depression to go away but actual torture and suffering does cause depression to vanish. I was looking for relief and comfort for my dysphonic feelings. But I did not expect this. I began to believe that I was going to die. John had no way of knowing when I came to the edge. He could not know when it was time to release me. As I thought, as the heat built in my body, I panicked, fainted, and writhed in agony. There was no escape. What had I done?

It seemed like an eternity but finally the hot first day came to an end as the heat lamps went low and finally went off. A new aspect of crucifixion appeared. Perspiration on my body dried. It became cold in the basement. I was thirsty, shivering from the cold, and cramping seemingly in every muscle in my body. The pain from the change in temperature was as bad as the hanging from the cross. My arms hurt, my armpits burned, and breathing became more difficult. Darkness brought a new terror. I was alone. I thought John had gone to bed and left me there with my cross as my only comfort.

I am not even going to try to explain how I suffered during the period of darkness but be sure that it was pleasing to see the timer turn the sun lamps on and daylight break up the darkness. It seemed that I had been on the cross for an eternity but it could have been no longer than twelve hours. The temperature began to rise in that basement. I was so thirsty! I became hot but could not sweat. I had peed during the darkness. Now I was ready to throw up all the contents in my stomach. I did but there was nothing there. The dry heaves made the pain worse. I began to panic. Why had I made myself go through this?

Where was John? I cried, screamed, and begged him to take me off the cross. I had had all I could take long ago.

“That’s not true,†John said, “you thought that yesterday but you have endured. You would like down but you’re crucified, your learning what crucifixion really is. You are learning what torture is and it is not what you fantasize it is; it really is what it is.â€

John then threatened me: “If you continue to complain, I am going to nail you to the cross. That will hasten your death and intensify your pain. I will cut your ropes and allow the nails to hold your 110 lb. body on the cross. Do you want to be nailed? I can do that!â€

John knew that a person on the cross could not keep from begging to come down but his intention was to terrify me. It worked. I was already about to lose my mind. The suffering was more than I could stand but I had to stand it. At the time I thought anything would be better than being nailed to the cross so I tried to keep quit. This was what John wanted. Time passed slowly. I fainted several times. It was difficult to raise my head; I hung there burning from the sun lamps, thirsting for water. I was motionless on the cross. Fear and panic gripped my heart. The suffering never stopped. It only intensified as the heat lamps began to go off. My lips and mouth was so dry that my lips began to crack and stick together. My tongue was pasted to the roof of my mouth. To scream or plead for mercy would have been very painful. There was no use anyway and I knew it. Why did I not realize what I was asking for when I wondered what it was like to be crucified?

When the heat lamps came on again, I realized that I had not been able to sleep. I did pass out several times. Waking up each time only made the darkness seem longer and the suffering even greater, so I began to wish that I was dead. I did not want to live, not like this.

After several hours John said to me that today was the third day in the sun lamp assimilation. He said that if I survived to the end of the day, he might decide that I had come to the edge but in all probability it would take another night session. I felt panic all that day for fear that John would not release me from the cross. In a way, I did not want off the cross. I wanted to die because I did not know how to live with the memory of this experience.

As the lamps went low, John said, “Here is some water; suck is slowly while I prepare to bring you down from your cross.â€

The water broke the seal on my lips and mouth enough so I could barley speak. I groaned as I felt the cross being lowered. Finally my cross was laid flat on the ground. Still tied to the cross John told me that he feared I was now a broken woman, that my mind had been damaged, and that I would never be able to forgive him for what he had done. He did say that he thought I would now know what it was like to be crucified.

“I know,†I said. “I expected to be on the cross not more than six hours, not three days; how many hours have I been on that cross?â€

Then came the greatest surprise of my life! John said, “Darling, you have been on the cross a total of three hours and you are a broken woman.â€

The torture had been real. But John was soon to learn that I had not been broken as I replied: “The next time then, we use nails.â€
 
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slave anne

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How many of you, especially women, would like to be crucified? How far would you go? Would you be nailed or tied with ropes? Have any of you had experiences with crucifixion?

i have as a part of my life of bondage (i'm 50+) and being a certified masochist.

first of all it is extremely dangerous and even more painful than anything i have ever done. not something to be taken lightly. in the real world, the one we all live in, being nailed is not an option as a way of being held in place. ropes aren't much better as the wrists can be damaged permanently through loss of circulation and nerve damage.

i have not experienced it in a few years but still remember vividly how much pain was involved, to the point i reached my limit which is very deep.
 
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