bf is sooo vanilla....

bluelagoon1988

bluelagoon1988

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Personally, I hate to sound negative but if the sex is lacking, it will eventually self destruct the relationship. Unfortunately, this sort of lifestyle is not something you can ask of somebody, they may do it but it will ruin it for you if you have to wonder if they are really enjoying it or not. Definitely give it a shot to see if he has the potential to be into it, but remember, safe, sane, and CONSENSUAL....not saying you would force him but half of the appeal is somebody who likes it as much as you do. Don't sacrifice your happiness because you feel guilty for wanting a compatible partner in all aspects, including sexually. I honestly wish you the best, I went through this exact thing with my last vanilla boyfriend so I can relate.
 
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theonlyone

theonlyone

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Don't give up hope. My Hubby and I were together 5 years or so before I got the guts to tell him what I want. I suggest telling him flat out u want to try some "rougher stuff". Some [most] guys need things spelled out. After u have been up open and honest about what u a
want find a dirty story that's similar to a fantasy of urs. Keep in mind that he has prob been brought up to respect women by being gentle and sweet in bed. I got a book at borders that has a wonderful introduction describing the common mental tug of war that happens in most male Dom minds early on. They have to suppress the voice of common society telling them that women are fragile and must be treated delicately. If u are serious about ur relationship, it is possible to turn ur hopelessly vanilla man in to a freak like the rest of us, but it will take time and lots of communication.
Hope I've been helpful.
 
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lost.soul07

lost.soul07

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theonlyone said:
Don't give up hope. My Hubby and I were together 5 years or so before I got the guts to tell him what I want. I suggest telling him flat out u want to try some "rougher stuff". Some [most] guys need things spelled out. After u have been up open and honest about what u a
want find a dirty story that's similar to a fantasy of urs. Keep in mind that he has prob been brought up to respect women by being gentle and sweet in bed. I got a book at borders that has a wonderful introduction describing the common mental tug of war that happens in most male Dom minds early on. They have to suppress the voice of common society telling them that women are fragile and must be treated delicately. If u are serious about ur relationship, it is possible to turn ur hopelessly vanilla man in to a freak like the rest of us, but it will take time and lots of communication.
Hope I've been helpful.
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thank you so much for your input, this really makes me feel alot better about my situation! I just have to be patient with him. I am very serious about this relationship, we have been together for over a year... but we're still young and have plenty of time to get freaky :)
 
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