BDSM and pregnancy

Discussion in 'General BDSM discussions' started by Moonlight, Jul 14, 2012.

  1. Moonlight

    Moonlight Member

    Do you refrain from playing while pregnant? Do you simply go carefully through the months miscarriage is the largest threat?

    This has been a crazy month with travel, visitors and then the 4th. Of course I was tired and I explained away breast tenderness. I got suspicious when I could have done an impersonation of Achmed the dead terrorist with my little girl .... Stop touching me!!! LOL sure enough I am preggers.

    Dear husband is now worried about doing anything to harm our little bean. Is it safer to just chill out for now?
     
    Free LIFE TIME Fileboom Premium
  2. sebastian

    sebastian Active Member

    Congratulations!

    As a gay man, I have zero personal knowledge here, so I'm just speculating. But there's a lot you can still do. You can do all the verbal stuff you want, and he can still give you lots of orders, call the shots sexually, and maintain protocols, at least until physically obeying orders becomes an issue. Heavy pain play is probably out, and spanking is gonna be hard to do (since you have to lie on your belly). But even lying on your back he can do some stuff, like tt (until your breasts start getting sensitive), pussy torture (though best to avoid insertive toys and electro is right out), and general sensation play. There are some bondage positions that will work, esp. spread-eagle, and gagging is an option.

    So there are things you can do, but obviously as your pregnancy progresses, your options will get fewer and fewer. But even at 8 months, you can do verbal play and talk fantasies (where you talk through a fantasy, maybe while you stroke each other). Maybe use it as a chance to explore some things you're curious about and see how each other reacts to the things you're saying. So if there's a kink you've wanted to try, try it in a talk fantasy and see if he gets into it.
     
  3. Moonlight

    Moonlight Member

    Thanks for the congrats and ideas. We will defiantly look into other kinks. He will not hit me at all now well not with any force anyway. I may be able to convince him light bondage is fine. The bean is in my tummy not my arms.:)
     
    Free LIFE TIME Fileboom Premium
  4. RopeRanger

    RopeRanger Member

    Congratulations!

    My partner was prone to plugged ducts and mastitis so heavy breast play was out for us. Sensation play, contrasting rough/silk/smooth/hot/cold was a big hit as everything seemed to be cranked up on high tactility for her.

    I found the power exchange especially pleasing once she started showing. Most constriction ties were out but I personally find Kinbaku-bi style ties very appealing during pregnancy. We just changed the angle for spankings. By having her hold the foot board of the bed she was more upright and comfortable.

    We just decided to explore and didn't go crazy - turned somethings down a couple notches and others up a bit until we found what was comfortable.
     
  5. sebastian

    sebastian Active Member

    Moonlight, have you and your partner explored rope harnesses? The harnesses that I've done don't actually constrict; they just fit tightly along the lines of the body, and they provide anchor points for tying the sub down. You might explore harnesses. They provide some feeling of being controlled--the dom can grab just about anywhere on the harness and control the sub's movement--without really constricting or restricting very much.

    And what about edging--stimulating you until you're close to orgasm and then backing off? It's very controlling without being very 'heavy'
     
    Free LIFE TIME Fileboom Premium
  6. Moonlight

    Moonlight Member

    Thanks.

    We have seen rope done in pictures but never tried it ourselves. Great ideas.
     
  7. thinmint7

    thinmint7 Member

    Yay!!! So awesome Moonlight congrats!!
     
    Free LIFE TIME Fileboom Premium
  8. Moonlight

    Moonlight Member

    Thank you! We are really excited. I am really tired nowadays but otherwise feeling good.
     
  9. subarama30

    subarama30 Member

    Congrats Moon, that's great. My littlest is almost 3 months old now.

    Basically for us anything kinky I'm into is out the window for a few reasons.

    1. I like it pretty rough/aggressive and would never risk doing the majority of things I like.
    2. I get sick, sensitive, blow up like a whale almost immediately and develop hip/pelvis problems so I either have little interest in things or can't physically do them.
    3. My man literally treats me like I'd break when pregnant so he won't be even remotely be a Dom to me during this time.

    Other than that, pregnancy rocks lol seriously though, I dont enjoy pregnancy itself, I don't bloom, I just get huge and miserable but I'm addicted to little people so I just keep doing it :) I just have to focus on the fun we can have once I'm back to normal.
     
    Free LIFE TIME Fileboom Premium
  10. Moonlight

    Moonlight Member

    I know exactly what you are talking about. I am struggling with not wanting to be touched too much. My breast hurt, sometimes a lot others not as bad but there is always some level of pain there. Then the morning sickness. Again some days are great and I only have a few moments of queasiness others it goes on all day.

    Then my husband is also treating me like I will break if he so much as touches me too hard. He put everything up, but I did not complain too much. It is hard to be in the mood for anything right now.

    The other day he was laying on the couch and I laid down with him. He cuddled for a bit before he tried to tickle me a bit. I told him to stop touching me. He laughed and said you are laying on me how am I not to touch you. LOL So I revised and said stop touching me in annoying ways.
     
  11. Mercyful Fate

    Mercyful Fate New Member

    In my opinion BDSM and pregnancy of concept not compatible unless it is possible to use an easy bandage.
     
    Free LIFE TIME Fileboom Premium
  12. sebastian

    sebastian Active Member

    Mercyful, remember that BDSM is not always about physical play. There are whole realms of power exchange that do not require the dom to touch the sub in any way.
     
  13. Mistress X

    Mistress X New Member

    To me, having a pregnant sub, just makes things more interesting. Obviously there are some new restrictions because you don't want to harm the baby. I LOVE tit play, so of course when a Sub is pregnant, you can play with her milk and such. I recomend control of when she releases her milk and getting a milk machine. :)
     
    Free LIFE TIME Fileboom Premium
  14. Moonlight

    Moonlight Member

    Yeah a breast pump? I plan on it. The last one I made the mistake of waiting to long to try and introduce a bottle. She wanted nothing to do with it.

    Yeah power exchange is fun. I enjoy it. We don't do leashes or cages though, Just not our style.

    He is relaxing a bit now that I am up to 8 weeks with no spotting or anything worrisome.
     
  15. storm

    storm Guest

    congratulations moonlight, i hope that you are now finding a way to play around, its gets even more interesting as your bump gets bigger too.

    when i was with my ex we carried on right through all 3 of my pg's and it was great, everything is far more intense.

    Also like Sebastiand said. its not all about this physical side. we had some rather interesting situations with no touch at all. just all words and the idea of touch.

    wishing you lots of fun,
     

Share This Page