Anal sex- Why??

Discussion in 'General fetish discussions' started by InnocentFacade, May 6, 2010.

  1. Click here for more.
    So as many of you know, my only way of communication is blunt, so here it is- I hate anal sex. Like I absolutely LOATHE having anything in my butt, be it a plug or a cock, or whatever.

    I'm about 99% sure it's more a mental block than a physical as my first "Dom" provided a really horrible, painful experience that bordered on not being consensual, and left me bleeding for a long time, and emotional scars for much longer.

    So basically I have two questions. Why do ya'll enjoy anal sex (or does anyone else hate it too???)? and does anyone have any suggestions for making this a less awful experience?

    Daddy's really into anal sex. While he respects and cares for me enough to not push if I'm sincerely not willing, I really want to please him and be okay with it, mayhaps even enjoy it?
  2. sluttysub

    sluttysub Member

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    My first experience with anal sex was not a pleasant one either, though it wasn't nearly as bad as yours. We were young and didn't know what we were doing and he tried to force his way in dry. That only lasted a couple seconds before I was screaming for him to stop. After that, I swore anal off for the rest of my life. Then I met someone whi knew what he was doing and showed me how pleasurable it could be. If it's one thing I'vev learned, it's to take it slow when you're just starting out. Use lots of lube, and just when you think you have too much, add some more. You will need to be relaxed, if you tense up, it can hurt. So make sure you've had lots of foreplay (and a vibrator on your clit doesn't hurt). Once you're horny and well lubed he should insert a finger slowly to help your muscles adjust and stretch. No pounding with thr finger, just slow gentle movements. Once you are comfortable with the finger, he should insert another, using the same technique. Once you have become accustomed to them, he should remove them and slowly insert his penis. I cannot stress enough how important it is that he move slowly. A good position is doggy style, because you can control how fast, how slow or how deep he goes. Slow, steady pressure is best. If you can't take his full length the first time, it's ok. This can take time. I'll be honest, even after I learned to do it correctly, it wasn't my favorite, but I didn't mind or hate it either. As my body became more accustomed to it, I found it more and more pleasurable. Now it's one of my favorites. :)

    Why do I enjoy it? It's hard to explain. I love the feel of the stretch for sure. But it's such a different, unexplainable feeling. It does bring me to mind blowing, earth shattering, body shaking orgasms though. :D

    If he can go slowly, and allow you time to adjust, in time you may find it very pleasurable, then you'll be begging for it! ;)
  3. Psyclapse

    Psyclapse New Member

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    Anal sex can be fun and painless when done correctly.

    My slave had a mental block about it. It was the thought of pain that put her off, not having a cock up there. When I showed her that anal could be painless, that block started to weaken.

    As the previous poster said, lubricant is key. With enough lube things can slide up there as easily as any wet pussy.

    Experiment with butt plugs, buy a small comfortable one. They might feel awkward, but your body will adjust. My slave says she enjoys being plugged after about 30 minutes. Just go to the toilet first!

    When it comes to anal sex, I never proceed until the slave is extremely aroused. If she's not in the mood, anal will feel like a punishment. But if we've been playing around and she's on the road to orgasm, she'll beg for cock anyway she can get it!

    I start with my fingers, properly lubed, and work her butt until they slide in with ease. I use rubber gloves for a better glide and to avoid sharp nails. If there's any resistance, I use more lube and keep up the foreplay. When she seems prepared, I start with my cock. The most important thing is to go in slowly and to communicate. I reassure her. The cock should glide.

    Until the slave is more experienced, the Dom should thrust very gently. He can go in deep, but only if he does it slowly and waits. Deep thrusts will not work. This isn't a porn movie. Shallow and slow thrusts will allow the slave to get a kick from it too.

    Ultimately, it's the submission and naughtiness of anal sex that makes it a thrill for my slave, it's animalistic sex. She's tied down, butt in the air, exposed. It should always be slightly scary.
  4. sebastian

    sebastian Active Member

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    For men, the real point of anal sex is stimulating the prostate. It's an amazing and indescribable feeling. When I get fucked, which hasn't happened much recently, it's always a little uncomfortable (not painful, just oddly full), but once that subsides, it's replaced with a marvelous full body sensation. There's a tingling that runs up my spine. It's the only time that I cum easily.

    Rather than doggie style, I would recommend starting with the bottom on top. That way the bottom can lower down onto the cock at his/her own rate and can easily pull off if it gets unpleasant. The bottom feels very much in control, so it's less anxiety-provoking. Once you've fully relaxed, switch over to doggie style or missionary, both of which permit deeper thrusting.
    Last edited: May 6, 2010
  5. MasterInTraining

    MasterInTraining New Member

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    When penetrating, you should always provide a low-constant-pressure, rather than just pushing it in. The muscle will slowly expand, relax, and allow the cock to glide in with ease.

    If you follow all of these steps mentioned in the thread there is almost no way that you will have a painful experience.
  6. sillylittlepet

    sillylittlepet Active Member

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    Seb, I tried to tell my master that, but he wont have any of it! My fingers aren't allowed to go anywhere in that region and he always gets suspicious of me T^T

    My biggest problem with anal sex is that I'm overly zealous about the whole experience. Sometimes I hate foreplay. Screw foreplay and let's get on with it! We can do foreplay later!
    This is all fine and dandy with vaginal sex, but with anal we always run into problems.

    You gotta slow down, and you have to relax. This is also really hard for me. Start with your fingers. They dont even have to go in your butt! Just make little circles on the outside. Then once you're kind of excited about it you can add lube and go a liiitle farther in

    I love anal sex personally, it makes me wet like a faucet
  7. sluttysub

    sluttysub Member

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    Hahaha! I have the same problem!

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    I feel like this too. I have this weird issue where my body craves it, but my head despises it, because of how previous partners have gone about it :( The only time I am willing to take any form of anal play is when I am extremely aroused, otherwise it feels horrible :(

    None of my previous partners were familiar with the concept of widening the hole enough for penetration to be comfortable, and neither did they seem to believe in lube. They would just force their way in dry, and it would hurt like hell :mad:

    My master is eager to train my arse properly, and I am excited about it too. We have not had actual anal sex yet; he has just used fingers and plugs on me, but with plenty of lube, time, and care :) He wants to buy a proper anal training kit, and take his time moving up through the different sizes of plugs before attempting sexual penetration. I think this will be a good experience, enjoyable, and I feel it will bring us closer together too :)
  9. sebastian

    sebastian Active Member

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    Rimming the sub's ass is another useful tool for helping the anus relax.

    It's funny, a lot of people seem to perceive having the bottom mount the reclining top as making the top passive, but I generally don't feel that way. When I fuck a boy, I often start that way. It let's me be lazy, and I assert control by giving instruction and encouragement and by being patient. Once the boy is all the way down, then I can start fucking him more aggressively.

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    I, personally, found mounting a cock for anal sex to be the most painful position imaginable :(
  11. sluttysub

    sluttysub Member

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    I never cared for it much either. Doggystyle has always been the most comfortable and pleasurable position for me.

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    Thanks guys. Definitely things to consider . . . I think part of the reason I want to overcome my . . . well, phobia is really the only word for it, is because overcoming something I hate so much would be an accomplishment for me (and Daddy would be VERY pleased =D).

    OLP- Sounds like we've had very similar experiences =(
  13. sillylittlepet

    sillylittlepet Active Member

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    I've had exactly the opposite experience, my first time was mounting and it went it really easily and worked really well. Possibly because I had full control of my movements

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    Well, I did say it was my own personal experience, it doesn't mean everyone will be exactly the same...
  15. sillylittlepet

    sillylittlepet Active Member

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    no of course!

    There are a lot of conflicting opinions when it comes to stuff like this!

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