If you're nervous, start with a mild version of your fantasy.
Talk about what's going to happen and agree on some boundaries.
With time, add some new elements.
Instruct your partner on being more gentle or more forceful during the session.
Always voice clearly what you want and what...
Marrying a virgin? Slaving away for a man 24/7?
Sounds like a Christian marriage. Other than the suicide part.
Sorry for being "funny". You seem like a nice guy. I hope you find a girl. You need to fuck.
Think of it like this:
God suicides us anyway. Our bodies fall apart on their own...
I have a similar relationship with my Master.
He's 30 years older so it comes naturally, I guess.
You could go for older guys.
A problem might arise while meeting your real daddy, tho.